A Tale of Two Shepards: Saving the Galaxy is a Family Affair
by TEAM Shepard
Summary: Commander John Shepard and his sister Maggie fight through the Council, Collectors and the Reapers themselves to discover what it really means to be a family. As close to cannon as possible, through Mass Effect 1, 2 and 3 and beyond. Updates weekly on Saturdays
1. Prologue 1: Akuze

**_Author's Note:_**

**_Drksyders here! Thank you for stopping by and reading A Tale of Two Shepards - a TEAM project bringing together some wonderful friends in our mutual love of Mass Effect. We really appreciate your comments, feedback, faves and reviews. _**

_**First. Many thanks to TEAM SHEPARD for all the time, support, love and dedication. You guys mean the world to me!**_

_**Second. A special thank you to my military advisers, Artimus and Kir El. Thank you guys for your service, sacrifice, and letting me constantly pick your brains about all things military. THANK YOU to all the men and women in uniform (except Cerberus), past and present, who have given so much for the rest of us.**_

_**Third. A big shout out and thanks to Roarkshop for her amazing work, Sense and Flexibility. She raised the bar of quality for fanficton and inspired this whole project. If you hate it, blame her. :)**_

_**Fourth. I'd like to dedicate A Tale of Two Shepards to my BBBFF (Big Brother Best Friend Forever), Jeremy. Who will always be the biggest badass in the galaxy to me.**_

_**Fifth and last. Mass Effect Characters, Terms, and Themes are owned by Bioware. No Copyright infringement intended. Please don't sue us.**_

* * *

**Prologue 1: Akuze**

No matter how hard 2nd Lieutenant John Shepard tried, the only thing he could see was a kitten.

The psychologist insisted that there was more to the exam, that he needed more data.

"Look at the entire picture, please," he said. "Consider the background, the placement of the subjects, and the colors used. This psychological test will only work if you cooperate. . ."

But still, no matter how hard he looked, all he could see was a kitten.

It was this damned hospital, he decided. Things didn't feel right here. Two months in an Alliance Military Hospital actually felt like six times that long - like Vorcha years. Colors and sounds were muted, as if he'd been caught in the effect radius of a flash-bang grenade that just didn't fade. The voices of the doctors were soft, tinny, and distant. Not that they ever had anything he wanted to hear. Not that he was talking much to anyone anyway.

And, this was the stupidest test of all. Showing him cartoon after cartoon. Shepard was past caring about what the so-called wizards wanted. He was a soldier; and not about to bare his soul over a stupid cartoon picture of a kitten. How could he feel something about a kitten, anyway?

The kitten didn't look anything like the terrified face Private Carter. He had begged not to die as he writhed in the blood-drenched sand. The ball of string couldn't help Chief Patel as the ground gave way beneath him and ultimately tipped him into a giant, toothed maw. The bright powder-blue sky had nothing to do with the helpless screams, sizzling acid, and ground-shaking roars from that day on Akuze.

The green grass didn't look anything like the pale-grey sand that covered that cursed planet's surface. The same sand he'd dragged himself through for 10 klicks, despite internal-bleeding, a broken leg, busted eardrums, and 2nd degree acid burns. There was no bright lemon-yellow sun that day; it was a starless overcast night when his squad, his men, his _friends_ had died.

Akuze. Already the planet's name had taken on a hushed and sinister tone when it was uttered by other members of the Alliance marines. None of them would ever understand what "Akuze" really meant, but there was a reverence in the name when they dared to speak it - always in whispers, as if merely speaking the name would cause the thresher maws to take notice.

There was nothing more to be said about Akuze. It had been hell. He'd survived it. He was ready to get back to work. Shepard knew he was fit for duty: he was twenty-three and healed quickly. He didn't know and didn't care why the top-brass were evaluating him so closely. Psych screenings, stress tests, and body scans. . . none of them told the truth: that being in this damned hospital was more painful than anything he'd seen on fucking Akuze.

"Are you having suicidal thoughts?"

"What?" Shepard asked.

"Are you having suicidal thoughts?" repeated the Alliance psychologist in a smooth, even tone.

"No." Shepard responded flatly. _It's not that I want to kill myself_. _It's just that I don't want to live._

"Are you having any trouble sleeping?"

"No." _Sleeping is no trouble; the dreams are._

The doctor paused a moment, scanning the datapad and waiting for a change in heart-rate, brain activity, or something to indicate distress. Eventually, he shrugged.

"Is anything there else you'd like to talk about?"

"No. May I be dismissed, sir?"

"We're done, for now. Dismissed, 2nd Lieutenant."

Shepard stood stiffly, offered a quick salute, and stepped out of the room. He moved mechanically, despite the slight limp, back towards the hospital bed and armchair surrounded by wack curtains that constituted his "room" at the hospital. He resumed his seat in the chair and continued to stare expressionlessly out the window.

More time passed, days perhaps. A voice distant and disembodied had spoken to him. It repeated itself, several times, trying to get his attention. He didn't remember sleeping or eating. He must've at some point. He looked over his shoulder at the speaker.

"Ma'am?"

The nurse repeated for the fifth time, obviously frustrated. "You have a visitor."

"Oh. Yes." He replied flatly and turned back to the window.

The nurse rolled her eyes and pulled back the flimsy curtain. A rustle of movement indicated someone had entered the "room" and sat on his bed. The nurse closed the curtain and he noted her footsteps walking away. He was about to give up the strain of paying attention when a vaguely familiar voice, young and laced with a smile, called to him from what seemed like another system.

"John?"

He continued to stare out the window, maybe if he ignored her, she would go away. But, the call repeated.

"Jooooooohhhhhn?" The voice called in a sing-song tease. His mind flooded with memories of mischievous laughter and tears damp on his shoulder. He remembered cleaning her brown and burgundy streaked hair, still matted with food after cafeteria fights. He remembered red-brown eyes that always sparkled with delight right before shooting him down in endless games of "Human versus Batarian Pirate." He remembered giggling bedtime stories about Rear-Admiral Faceblaster and his rogue military crew roaming the galaxy to dispense justice and right wrongs.

The memories, like that stupid cartoon kitten, were unrelated to Akuze. And, just as easily ignored.

Finally the steps rose, moving in front of him and closing the window. Corporal Margaret Lynn Shepard leaned against the window sill lowering her slender face into in his line of sight. She'd changed since he'd last seen her. She'd grown taller, filled out, and lost the gawky awkwardness of a teenager - but, she was still unmistakably his sister. It was the eyes - everyone had always said - that marked them as siblings.

"Jo-Jo? Earth to Jo-Jo. Are you in there?" The girl rapped her knuckles softly on his forehead with a playful air. John looked up and he felt a sickness in the pit of his stomach.

"Maggie?" He asked, a tinge of surprise coming through the deadpan stupor.

"Yeah. It's me."

Something else was different. She still had that misleading youthful innocence to her appearance and her eyes still sparkled with mischief and life. And then, he saw the uniform. He tried to remember the last time he saw her.

"Mags.. I…" he tried to begin; he didn't even know where to start. Suddenly, he noticed his hands were trembling and emotions flickered across his face. He looked up at her, unable to hide the pain in his eyes.

Before he could get any further, her arms were around his neck, squeezing in a show of force he never remembered his sister being capable of. He put his arms uncertainly around her and sagged. It was Maggie, his sister. He thought he would never see her again and everything came crashing back.

His men, the maws, the smoke, gunfire, and blood. And, for the first time since it happened he _felt_ it. His body started to shake and she just gripped him tighter. The tears pricked his eyes and he hugged her fiercely as if the contact would help hold the emotions at bay.

"uggh.. air! Jo-jo, AIR! Need….to…breathe" she huffed, shoving him off with a laugh and flexing her shoulders.

Maggie stepped back and looked down at him, concern and worry in her usually smiling eyes. She took his hands simultaneously pulling him standing while kicking the chair away and then crossed her ankles and sat on the floor with her back to the wall below the window, hauling him down next to her.

They used to sit like that and talk for hours in the air ducts of the stations and ships where they played as children. They sat against the wall cornered between bed and chair. Somehow enclosed spaces felt like home, or as close to "home" as they ever achieved from their mother's postings. The fond memories of childhood were forcing away the painful memories of battle. She didn't let go of his hand and he stared at their feet stretched out side by side. He finally found his voice.

"How's mom?"

"Oh… mission-ing someplace. The usual. Blah blah top secret, blah blah security" The levity in her tone almost made him smile.

"She really wanted to be here," his sister continued, "but last I heard she was somewhere near the Hades Gamma cluster. It was just too far."

"I understand…So, Engineering Corps huh?"

She laughed.

"Don't act so surprised. We can't all be ground-pounder jarhead officers and make mom proud like _some_ people." She leaned into him with a playful nudge. "And besides, I love to build things. It seemed like the best compromise after …" She trailed off and let the sentence hang.

They both winced in unison at the memory and Maggie cleared her throat awkwardly.

"Anyhow…I joined with the Engineers just after the last time we saw you on the SSV Einstein before mom took that posting on the Kilimanjaro. They recruited me when they saw my work on upgraded turret targeting. Things could be better, but, at least, mom and I are talking again. It's Corporal now, by the way."

"Congratulations." He nudged her with an elbow.

"Yeah yea…Mr. bloody 2nd Lieutenant. You've jumped the ranks faster than anyone's ever seen. And then..."

He felt her stiffen by his side. Shepard winced at even the suggestion of Akuze in conjunction with his career. He didn't want to get a reward for his failure. Part of him still feared the review would earn him a court martial. But, all of those concerns were blasted from his thoughts when Maggie exploded with anger.

"And then you fucking disappear for nearly three months! Not a goddamn word to me _or_ Mom. I get back from the Academy to find reports of your unit wiped out. We thought you were dead! I'm AWOL right now, you know. I've been trying to track you down for weeks. Mom called in a favor to Anderson who stepped in when we couldn't find you."

The words had tumbled out of her and she was breathless. Her caramel skin flushed with emotion. In a quick movement, she ducked her head into his shoulder. He felt tears soaking through his uniform, but didn't look. Instead, he put an arm around her to comfort her as she cried.

"I thought we lost you, Jo-Jo," she sniffled.

Maggie always rallied after a good cry. So, John let her be. Seeing her pain made him come face to face with his own. He realized how numb and paralyzed he'd been. It was dangerous, he'd hardly recognized his own sister.

He took a deep breath and forced the emotions to run through him. The anger. The hurt. The raw terror. The guilt. He'd let all of them down. He didn't deserve to live while so many soldiers worth ten of him had died.

"Besides" she sniffled, "you can't leave me alone with Mom - we'll kill each other."

He nodded sagely.

"Ain't that the truth…"

"Ugh, look. You've gone and made me all splotchy."

Maggie skirted the silence by trying to push the tears away from her face. She stood and went to her own pack on the bed, rummaging noisily. Eventually, she seemed to find what she was looking for and returned to sit next to him on the floor, dabbing at her eyes with the sleeve of her uniform. The girl took his hand and latched an omni-tool around his wrist. He hadn't worn one since the mission.

"Anderson says… and I quote… 'Check your damn messages.' "

He grumbled his protests as he fumbled with the orange holo-display of the device. At his side, he heard his sister deftly using her own, custom built wrist-based technological wonder. She couldn't keep her fingers off the damn thing for more than an hour, but the familiarity of her gestures was a comfort. Shepard, on the other hand, was a soldier and never overly fond of technology. He recognized its value, but he'd trade a good firearm for the omni-tool any day.

For Anderson, he'd make an effort of it.

Anderson had been their mother's Captain and, unlike many other officers, he actually enjoyed having the children on his ship. He'd always kept an eye on them even after new postings and promotions had separated them. So, Shepard "checked his damn messages."

His eyes moved over the dozens of messages that accumulated in his absence; a large number of them from Maggie herself after he went MIA. There were fitness reports, statement requests, debrief meetings that he had entirely ignored, with strongly worded reprimands for not appearing at said debriefs.

"July 1st, o-seven-hundred," his sister intoned without looking up from her own omni-tool.

He glared at her, though he wasn't surprised. Communications systems were easy as breathing for her. He quickly found the indicated message.

_July 1, 2177  
__2__nd_ _Lieutenant John Shepard  
__Major Thomas Hirsch Memorial Hospital  
__Room 321_

_ Greetings Mr. Shepard:_

_ You have been selected for admission and are authorized to report to the Systems Alliance's Interplanetary Combatives Training (ICT) program, Vila Militar in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, Earth on 22 September 2177, before 10:00am local standard time. You will find helpful information in the enclosed instructions about transportation, baggage, funds, and other matters pertaining to admission._

_ You are congratulated on this opportunity for admission to the Alliance Special Forces advanced combat training, for it comes only to a select few of humanity's best. It presents a challenge that will demand your best effort. Therefore, it is suggested that you give serious thought to your desire for a military career as, without proper motivation, you may find it difficult to conform to what may be a new way of life._

_ Wishing you a full measure of success and satisfaction as a member of the "N-School" and as a commissioned officer in the Systems Alliance Armed Forces,_

_ I am __sincerely yours,_

_ Rear Admiral Brian Kahoku_

He barely had time to process what the message meant before he felt a nudge from his side with a mocking echo of his own words.

"Congratulations."

Anger surged in him and he turned away from her, disengaging the omni-tool from his wrist and throwing it angrily at the bed with a stream of curses. He pushed himself up, pacing the tiny space between the bed and dislocated chair.

"How dare they reward me? I got my whole squad killed! Congratulations, join us at the most advanced combat training in the galaxy? You managed to not die, let's promote you?"

He fumed and raged in the tiny space.

Maggie stared at him blankly, confusion in her face, wincing at his particularly colorful expletives. She let his anger run it's course and when she saw his shoulders slump, anger turning to hurt, she grabbed his hand and pulled him down to sit next to her once again. The small girl wrapped both her arms around his bicep and squeezed.

"Easy, Jo-Jo," she soothed him with her voice. "This is what you wanted isn't it? You got into N-School. At 23! No one does that. How is this bad? Talk to me."

He pulled his arm away from her grip, pulling his legs up and resting his elbows on his knees, leaning his head back against the wall. His words felt strange in his mouth, it had been months since he really talked. But, it would be pointless to keep the truth from Maggie.

"We were sent in to find the civilian pioneer team on Akuze. They hadn't reported in for days. Our orders were simple. Investigate and report. We found the settlement completely intact. No damage and no trace of the team. It was 10 klicks to the landing zone. So, we set up watch and hunkered down for the night…"

John's throat tightened. He felt the emotions ready to overwhelm him again. Then, he felt his sister lean against his side, her contact a gentle comfort. He took a rattling breath and continued.

"It just happened so fast. I didn't even see it begin." He closed his eyes. Visions of his men melting and screaming as the acid sizzled through armor and flesh alike, the terrible crunching sound of bone, the smell of burning metal, flesh, and ozone from overloaded shields mixed together in a horror beyond measure. And, he'd failed them. His hand went instinctively to his leg, the scars from the skin grafts beneath his fatigues still fresh.

"They all died and I couldn't do a damned thing about it. But, they kept fighting…we…kept fighting until the end. I don't know why or how I crawled back to the LZ. But, I know I shouldn't be alive right now. I failed all of them and they want to fucking _reward_ me. I can never repent for that and I refuse to gain from it."

He didn't even realize his hands were shaking again until Maggie had grabbed them. She was sitting across from him, cross-legged. He hadn't felt her move, he was so lost in reliving his memories. Together, they were shadowed in the small space with his back firmly against the wall. It felt safe and his mind was starting to clear.

"You're never going to repent." She said somberly after the silence had stretched. "And, what would they want with repentance anyway? You think that's going to make them feel better? You think your friends and crew are going to be happy if you give up?" He started at her words, but she looked him dead in the eyes and drilled her message into his mind like a sniper shot.

"You are not going to repent. You are going to fight for them. Every bullet you fire will be a flower on their graves. Every mission you complete will be a prayer for their souls. And, every life you save will honor their memories. You will honor them, John Shepard. You will honor them until the whole damn galaxy knows each and every one of their names as well as you do."

He stared at his sister while shock and heart-wrenching pain contorted his face. But, a fire was lit in him and it spread from his gut with a strange burning calmness following in its wake. He knew somehow in his very core that her words were an ultimate and simple truth. He knew this would change him forever.

"And you will message me every month on the dot to let me know you're still breathing or so help me I will track you down and beat you with your own goddamn rifle. Promise?" She added with a fierce smile through her tears and despite everything, he couldn't help but smile right back at her.

"Promise."


	2. Prologue 2: Brazil

**Prologue 2: Brazil**

John Shepard read the message on his omni-tool for the third time, but it didn't make the disappointment any easier.

His sister, Maggie, had been denied the leave to attend his N-School graduation. Her support, messages, and regular visits had kept him sane through the four years of brutality that ICT called "training." But, he had made it – the N7 designation on his full-dress uniform filled him with swelling pride.

Out of the three hundred officers that arrived at "The Villa" four years ago, he was the only one who toughed it out until the end. Graduates N1 through N6 made up just over 50 others. They were the best and the brightest, but they weren't him. He glanced down at the N7 designation again and smiled.

_You will honor them, John Shepard._ The memory of his sister's voice repeated.

He hoped he'd done them proud.

After a long eternity of singing, salutes, pageantry and flag ceremonies, they began an even longer eternity of speeches. Shepard sat straight-backed as the top brass droned on about their accomplishments, their future, and humanity's position in forming galactic peace. The sweat trickled down his back beneath his dress blues.

He still couldn't believe that the graduation ceremony was actually outside on The Villa's training grounds in Rio. The heat and humidity were sweltering. The patriotic decorations and neatly lined chairs provided a stark contrast to the training grounds as he had last seen them.

John remembered the debilitating heat, sweat and mud mixing in his eyes as he crawled belly-deep under razor wire with tracer rounds going over his head. His useless Turian rifle, one of hundreds he'd been trained to use, was digging into his forearms and widening the already established bruises while the sniper teams called out targets. All of this followed an eight mile endurance run and preceded two-hours of hand-to-hand drills.

That was N1.

N2 was a similar level of brutality, except cross-training with Turian officers on a remote asteroid where the chlorine atmosphere spelled slow choking death for a single armor seal breach. The Officers had left them without rations for weeks and the test only ended when the last cadet ran out of oxygen. N3 - demolitions and special ops - where field manuals were a twenty second head start. By the time he reached N6, the five remaining candidates moved to live-fire operations which they only later learned were actual field missions.

At N7, he stood alone.

Shepard stared straight ahead. Like all soldiers, he had perfected the art of appearing to be at rapt attention while _actually _paying attention to other things. Out of the corner of his eye, he scanned the audience and thought he could pick out his mother's uniform among the relative sea of strangers. Finally, they began to call out the names of the graduates beginning at N1. They read each name and moved through the designations, the cheers and anticipation of the crowd growing at each level until it was nearly a physical presence.

"Staff Lieutenant John Shepard: Alliance Marines, N7"

He could've heard a pin drop in that crowd.

John stood at full attention and marched with unhurried steps towards the center of the stage; trying to ignore the whispers of "Akuze" moving through the crowd. He offered a snappy formal salute before shaking hands with the Admiral who presented him with a small case containing his N7 badge. The man looked him up and down with a fierce smile, spouting congratulations. Shepard kept his face a neutral mask as he murmured his thanks.

The charade over, he turned sharply with parade-drill precision and began to return to his seat. The crowd seemed to take a collective breath, until a loud and piercing whoop of glee echoed from the back rows. He looked up sharply, but he already knew who was causing all the fuss.

His sister's beaming face caught the sun and, despite the complete breach of protocol, the crowd joined with enthusiastic cheers. A torrent of elation erupted, with the most force coming from his fellow graduates on the stage. Shepard tried to fight the color creeping up his cheeks and took a moment to present a formal salute to his comrades. His fellow servicemen cheered all the louder for this display of camaraderie and he had to fight his way through reaching hands before he could sit down for the rest of the ceremony.

Luckily, the rest of the ceremony did not last long and he was able to make his way towards his family. Maggie looked radiant in her Engineering Corps dress grays, despite standing out like a sore thumb in a sea of Alliance Navy blues and blacks. It made a stark contrast next to their mother and he realized the tension between them before they noticed his presence. He would have gone to them immediately, but a classmate caught him first.

"Hey, Johnnie!" the olive-skinned man called after Shepard, trotting the last few paces to catch up to him.

Shepard stopped and turned to face his biotic comrade.

"Amir!" Shepard greeted the man warmly, grasping his forearm.

"N7, huh?" the man replied with a roguish smile. "Always knew you were an overachiever."

"N3 is nothing to be ashamed of...even with your biotic handicap." Shepard ribbed the older man.

"Super-powers make you lazy. Which is why I use bombs, too!" He offered another one of those trademark grins. "Speaking of bombs, some of the guys are heading to BARbarella to celebrate." Amir waggled his eyebrows conspiratorially.

"Maybe later – I got a bomb of my own to defuse." He nodded towards his family. "Mom and sister."

Amir followed Shepard's gaze to the women and whistled low. "Sister, huh? I see who got all the looks in the family. She single?"

"I _will_ shoot you."

"I'd be a perfect gentleman!"

"Goodbye, Amir." Shepard laughed, turning his back and resuming his walk towards his family.

"I don't care about that Mom, I just couldn't miss this for John," he heard his sister say as he approached

"Margaret, this is just unacceptable." His mother retorted. "There will be disciplinary action."

"Bah. My CO will cover for me. I'll be back before they even miss me. And, besides I got you and Anderson to cover my…Oh hey there! Mr. N7 Super-Soldier!"

That last part was directed to him as he managed to close the distance. In a heartbeat, Maggie had jumped into his arms with a fierce hug. The impact was so jarring, he was forced to spin around to compensate for her momentum, nearly knocking them both into the crowd. The ceremonial sword at his hip was responsible for most of the collateral damage.

Shepard offered muted apologies, but on a day like today, no one was anything but smiles. Even his mother was forced to surrender the argument in favor of the shameless display of happiness.

"Congratulations, John." Captain Hannah Shepard offered formally.

"Thank you, Ma'am." He responded, peeling his sister away so he could embrace his mother gently, kissing her proffered cheek.

"Brrrrrr." Maggie scoffed as she watched her family's stoic display. She interrupted the moment with a stiff punch to Shepard's shoulder. She let out a squeak of surprise, shaking out her hand and kissing her knuckles. "Geeez, Jo-Jo! What have they been doing to you? I could tell you bulked up from the vid-calls, but daaaaaaamn. You could crush a Krogan skull with those guns!"

She stepped close again and gave his bicep a squeeze with her hand.

Shepard couldn't help but laugh as Maggie carried on, despite the angry glares of their mother, or perhaps _because_ of the glares. There was no stopping the joy that exuded from all of them. It was a beautiful day.

* * *

The sun was creeping towards the horizon as Shepard walked his sister back to her transport. His cheeks hurt from smiling so much that day. It was a good ache.

He hadn't really thought about what it would mean to complete the prestigious N-7 program. He just knew he had to get it done and get through it. It never much occurred to him about an "after;" though his commanding officers let no shortage of hints escape that there were big placements on the way for him.

"I'm glad you came, Mags. It was good to see you. But, I'm with Mom on this one. It was stupid to risk going AWOL _again_ for me...Last time, you're lucky Anderson had your back. Just because you can break the rules, doesn't mean you should."

"Aww… come on, John." She pouted. "I'll meet up with my team at Mars before they hit the relay. Besides, the regs need shaking up every now and again. Some things are just more important than all that."

"I shouldn't be one of those things." He grumbled and she gave him a fierce punch in the arm.

"Hey, OW!" he retorted, laughing and rubbing his arm. But, she was angry and serious.

"You are _EXACTLY_ one of those things." She growled at him. "And, don't you forget it!"

"Yes, Ma'am!" he stood up straight in a mock salute and they both nearly fell over laughing. It took a few moments for each of them to recover.

"How long is this 'good-will' Turian joint operation on Palaven anyways?"

"A year at least...probably two." She sounded sad. "Rumor is the Council is behind this project, too. I'll still message or call every month. That was our promise right?"

"Absolutely."

"And… well… depending on where your postings take you… we might be able to visit." She smiled at him. "I'll bring you some Turian facepaint or something fun. As a souvenir!"

"Yeah… sure. I'll love that." He looked down at his feet. They had reached the transport and they were stalling the goodbyes. "Did you smooth out everything with mom?"

"As much as I can." She shrugged her shoulders. "I'll never be a good little soldier who follows the rules, much-less a navy officer, and that's always going to sting her."

"But, you're good right?"

"Yeah. I'm good...We're good. Are _you_ good?"

He breathed out a sigh and nodded. She grinned and stood on her tip-toes to pull him into a hug.

"I'm really proud of you, Jo-Jo. You've done good and you got lots more to do."

"I got a lot to make up for." They shared a knowing glance before, as if my mutual understanding, they stepped away from each other. Maggie headed for the transport.

"I'll talk to you next month!" She called out to him with a wave as she boarded.

"It's a promise! See you on the other side, Mags." He responded with a grin and watched until the transport was out of sight.

* * *

*** Commander John Shepard Archived Messages Transferred to SSV Normandy SR-1 Terminal ***

To: JoJo*shepnet-oracle  
From: MightyMaggie*shepnet-oracle  
Date: April 11, 2181  
Subject: Happy Birthday, Jo-Jo!

John -

See attached vid of a Marilyn Monroe Krogan singing happy birthday.

*insert evil laughter here*

You're welcome.

~Maggie

To: JoJo*shepnet-oracle  
From: MightyMaggie*shepnet-oracle  
Date: May 21, 2181  
Subject: RE: Graduation date details

I got the details you sent, and the dicks behind desks refuse to grant me any leave so close to our deployment for Palaven. The logic behind refusing R&R before a long-deployment continues to make me homicidal. They are putting a lot of emphasis on this "good-will joint-technology" project with the Turians. But, it's all very hush-hush. I'm not sure what clearance you have now. But, my team isn't even allowed to know what we're working on, despite being the ones to do the damn work. We're just allowed to know what equipment to bring. And, even if I did know, I couldn't tell you anyhow.

I'm sure you'll look wonderful all gussied up for the ceremony – make sure Mom sends vids. This is a huge deal, John – I want you to enjoy every minute of it.

Congrats,

~Maggie

To: JoJo*shepnet-oracle  
From: MightyMaggie*shepnet-oracle  
Date: June 23, 2181  
Subject: Mars Transfer Complete

Hey –

Met up with squad safe n' sound at Mars way station. Turns out one of my squaddies was violating quarantine procedures with a hamster. Hah! My subtle and infiltrator-like sojourn at your graduation wasn't even noticed. But, my CO did kick up the price of silence. Send credits? Or maybe just growl at him for me.

Heading for relay tomorrow. Let me know where you're posting and how to contact you by extranet. Maybe we can get vidcalls going?

Lots o' hugs

~Maggie

PS. See attached holos from graduation

To: JoJo*shepnet-oracle  
From: MightyMaggie*shepnet-oracle  
Date: July 25, 2181  
Subject: RE: Torfan Patrol posting

Wow, John. I don't know how you could make anti-pirate patrols sound boring…but you just did. You are fighting batarian space pirates. I'm pretty sure we made a badly drawn comic about that when we were kids. Remember Rear-Admiral Face-blaster? If he was a real person, he'd be your CO right now. Or, maybe a snarky side-kick.

Your concern for the hamster is touching. His name is "George." I wish I could tell you he will have a long and happy life – but you do realize he's a small furry animal stuck on a transport ship with a squad of bored engineers right? He's already been subjected to several poorly designed aerial attempts.

T-minus two weeks or so until we're planet side.

Boredy boredily bored,

~Maggie

To: JoJo*shepnet-oracle  
From: MightyMaggie*shepnet-oracle  
Date: August 28, 2181  
Subject: Safely Arrived on "Melt-your-face-off" Planet

Hey Jo-Jo,

Been on Palaven for a week and I'm already hating my enviro-suit. The rest of my squad is happy to be planet side instead of on transport ships. To be honest, I miss the ships. I'm in the suit at all hours, even to sleep, unless we're in specially designed human habitats (yes, they call them habitats… MOOOOOOO!) How can you stand to be in armor 20 hours a day? I suddenly have extensive sympathy for the Quarians.

Cool holos of alien planet, George and my squad attached.

Good news – we have steady extra-net – my address also is attached. Call me next month.

Miss your face,

~Maggie

To: JoJo*shepnet-oracle  
From: MightyMaggie*shepnet-oracle  
Date: October 15, 2181  
Subject: RE: Where the hell are you?

I'm sorry I didn't return any of your vid-calls or messages. First off, I'm ok! But, I am in the hospital at Cipritine. Believe it or not the Turians got some good doctors. I've been here for a while. I got some really bad allergic reaction to SOMETHING in the field, but they don't know what it is. The doctors were all looking at me like I made out with a Turian or something. But, they ran the tests and I'm not allergic to dextro-amino acids and only NOW are they taking my anaphylactic shock seriously. In the meantime, I'm in a clean room and I'm monitoring my team's progress on Project Classified remotely by vid and datapad.

They've run lots and lots of tests. Any crazy family allergies I should know about?

Universal rule of the galaxy – all hospital food sucks.

Solana, the Turian nurse on my floor is teaching me "Turian" – they don't really have varying languages like we do. Just local accents. The curse words are amazing! So far my favorite is "Piss under your plates" It's kinda like calling someone a coward. I wonder if it's connected to "yellow-bellied" except that Turian piss isn't yellow (the things you learn from a nurse!)

Off for more tests –

~Maggie

To: JoJo*shepnet-oracle  
From: MightyMaggie*shepnet-oracle  
Date: October 16, 2181  
Subject: RE: RE: RE: Where the hell are you?

Ha ha. Very funny. I am 100% sure that I didn't make out with a Turian, you big jerk.

~M

To: JoJo*shepnet-oracle  
From: MightyMaggie*shepnet-oracle  
Date: October 22, 2181  
Subject: FUCK VARREN!

I'm allergic to Varren. Get yourself tested. Don't eat it and don't trust your squadmates when they fetch your lunch and tell you it's "food."

Back on site for project – on target to be done by the end of 2183. So, just in case you forgot, here's my vid-call address now that I'm back. I expect a call, soon.

If you see any stupid ugly space dogs, shoot one for me.

Your varren-phobic sister,

~Maggie

To: JoJo*shepnet-oracle  
From: MightyMaggie*shepnet-oracle  
Date: October 24, 2181  
Subject: RE: RE: FUCK VARREN!

Glad to know I got the short-end of the genetic stick. Enjoy your non-varren-allergic lifestyle.

~M

To: JoJo*shepnet-oracle  
From: MightyMaggie*shepnet-oracle  
Date: December 25, 2181  
Subject: Merry X-mas, Jo-Jo!

JoJo-

I hope you got your Christmas gift. Solana helped me pick it out. It's not facepaint (sorry!) but it's supposed to be a coming of age thing for Turians when they leave for bootcamp or their "service". ALL turians leave for bootcamp at 15 years old and it lasts for 7 years. Harsh, huh? Anyway, it's called a "Kha-ril" or as near as I can spell it. I still haven't learned the written language, probably never will. Anyway, I hope you like it!

Decking the halls with sensor hardware,

~Maggie

To: JoJo*shepnet-oracle  
From: MightyMaggie*shepnet-oracle  
Date: January 18, 2182  
Subject: RE: Happy Birthday, Mags

Ugh… I know it's crazy right? 25 is like the end of everything. Does this mean I have to start acting like a grown-up?

'cause I don't wanna!

~M

To: JoJo*shepnet-oracle  
From: MightyMaggie*shepnet-oracle  
Date: February 21, 2182  
Subject: TURIANS ROCK!

Holos from Turian New Year's party I told you about – I'm so glad Solana invited me! Is it bad that I like hanging with her better than my squad-mates?

Vid ya soon.

~Maggie

To: JoJo*shepnet-oracle  
From: MightyMaggie*shepnet-oracle  
Date: March 8, 2182  
Subject: Vid me when you can

Hey John –

I know we just spoke last week – but I need to talk to you. There's a group of people petitioning the Turian Hierarchy for reparations for families and survivors of the First Contact War. They want me to testify. I don't even know how to feel about it. What would I even say about Dad? You think I should?

Talk to you soon.

Love,

~Maggie

To: JoJo*shepnet-oracle  
From: MightyMaggie*shepnet-oracle  
Date: March 10, 2182  
Subject: RE: Holos of Dad

Thanks for sending these. It really helped. I'm glad we talked and I'm glad you convinced me to stay out of the political craziness. It certainly would have strained things with my Turian teammates if I was on the news for that stuff. You always have such great insights about these things.

Hope those dumb frontier colonists appreciate you as much as I do.

~Maggie

To: JoJo*shepnet-oracle  
From: MightyMaggie*shepnet-oracle  
Date: April 11, 2182  
Subject: Happy Birthday!

You're 28 – get a girlfriend that doesn't fire bullets.

Love you!

~Maggie

To: JoJo*shepnet-oracle  
From: MightyMaggie*shepnet-oracle  
Date: June 28, 2182  
Subject: Good news!

Hey Jo-Jo,

We're ahead of schedule and will be done by September. I am so excited to get to a planet that doesn't require enivro-suits. Though, truth be told I spend most of my time out of atmo at the orbital construction platform. But, whenever I do go planetside to visit Solana, I gotta wear that stupid metal hell-cage. And, it's so bloody hot!

I got some leave coming up – I was thinking about visiting mom for Thanksgiving on the _Kilimanjaro_. Can you get leave in November and meet up with me there? I want to surprise her. Scuttlebutt says _Kilimanjaro_ is patrolling near Demeter through the end of the year.

Let me know!

~Maggie

To: JoJo*shepnet-oracle  
From: MightyMaggie*shepnet-oracle  
Date: August 31, 2182  
Subject: RE: Thanksgiving Leave & Travel Schedule

Ugh – don't you know the meaning of "surprise!" Why'd you have to message Mom about Thanksgiving plans! You're such boy scout!

But, anyway thanks for putting together all these details! I can't wait to see you. Great thought about adding a couple of extra days on the Citadel – I'm really looking forward to that. You're forgiven for ruining the surprise only if you buy me something nice from the Citadel – I do love model ships. Hint hint.

~Maggie

To: JoJo*shepnet-oracle  
From: MightyMaggie*shepnet-oracle  
Date: November 11, 2182  
Subject: That's Staff Sergeant Mags to you!

Hi Jo-Jo!

I'm on the transport, headed to the Citadel, and I just got word of my promotion - Staff Sergeant. The top-brass is wildly pleased with the results of the project – finished almost a year early and ready for launch! Wow… it makes me so legitimate, it terrifies me. They cited my "fostering goodwill with Turian allies" AKA Turian drinking games and "exemplary project design and execution" AKA fix all the problems - in my commendation message. If I keep this up, maybe I'll outrank you someday. HA!

I'll bring the new star & bars for mom. Maybe it'll get her off my back for a few months.

See you soon,

~Maggie


	3. Prologue 3: The Citadel

**Prologue 3: The Citadel**

It was nearly two years before Commander John Shepard saw his sister again.

It was Thanksgiving 2182 and they had coordinated their leave to meet up on the Citadel before traveling together for holiday dinner with their mother on the Kilimanjaro. He had spent two years leading an elite marine squad of the 10th Frontier Division in a joint operation with the 6th Fleet to root out pirate bases and disrupt smuggling operations. The operation had been a resounding success, but he was still glad for the R&R while his new orders were processed.

Shepard stepped off the transport into the press of bodies bustling about the docking bays. He was thankful for his height, towering at 1.95m and allowing him to peer over the tops of most the throng, except for the Turians who towered over the press like himself.

"Jo-Jo!" a joyous squeal caught his attention and he spied his sister, in civvies, standing in a flower bed to get above the press. She was waving enthusiastically. Shepard grinned, hoisting his bag over his shoulder and started pushing through bodies to reach her.

He saw a Turian C-sec officer approach and speak with her, probably to get her out of the planter. His sister's growling response floated back, something that definitely wasn't English, but Shepard was too far away for his translator to it pick up. The C-sec officer looked thoroughly surprised and angry, as much as you could tell with a Turian face. His mandibles flared and it looked like they were heading for violence before Shepard managed to casually insert himself between the two.

He dropped his bag, wrapped his arms around his sister in a hug, and bodily pulled her off of the planter and back to ground level. He locked eyes on the Turian, daring him to make a move. His size and uniform seemed to do the trick for defusing the situation as the officer retreated, grumbling under his breath.

"Maggie - making friends as always I see." He greeted her warmly, putting a hand on her head and mussing her hair as he reached down and recovered his pack.

"I love cussing at Turians in Turian!" Maggie beamed proudly. "How was your flight?"

"Can't complain."

Maggie began to walk towards what he assumed was a taxi stand and he followed by her side.

"I got us a hotel room with a beautiful view of the Presidium! It's a little small, but separate beds," she continued as her fingers danced over her omni-tool. She flowed through the press of people smoothly without looking up. Shepard's mere towering presence seemed to clear a path for him.

"That should be fine." Shepard confirmed with a smile. "It can't be as bad as when Mom was stationed on the Leipzig."

"Oh, wow! The Leipzig. That brings back memories. Tiny as hell, the three of us hot racking that tiny bunk bed. But, I loved the prototype Thanix cannon."

Shepard rolled his eyes. "Yes yes. I remember. Six months that was all you talked about."

"You have no idea how handy that was."

"What was that now?"

She grinned up at him. "Sorry… classified."

"Brat."

"Missed you too."

* * *

It felt strange and alien to be in civilian clothes, but Maggie had insisted.

"It's not a vacation if you're in uniform!" she ordered and he acquiesced to her demands.

He didn't even bring any clothes outside of his uniforms, so after cleaning up at the hotel, there was shopping to be done. Afterwards, they explored the center of galactic civilization with a semi-interested air. Shepard took in the sights with polite attention, but Maggie was far more interested in the construction of the Citadel itself.

If he heard, "Please do not disturb the keepers" from the station VI one more time, he swore he couldn't be held responsible for his own actions.

"Maggie – just leave the space bugs alone before I have to call mom for your bail money."

"But…" She began to protest, but he glared down at her with his "commander" face and she relented.

"Fine. I'm hungry anyway."

After a martini lunch, they took a guided tour of the Presidium that was incredibly educational. Shepard enjoyed the history of the Council and various tales of cultural assimilation much more than he anticipated, the alcohol probably helped. With the exception of the Turians, Maggie could have cared less.

Neither of them had really anticipated how big the station was and by the end of the tour Maggie was complaining of aching feet. They rested near one of the fountains. Maggie hurdled a railing and found a secluded grassy spot, underneath an alien tree with a small bench nearby. It was pristine, isolated, and peaceful. Maggie took off her shoes and dangled her toes in the water.

"You know, that's the station's drinking water," Shepard muttered, eyeing her from the bench where he sat.

"Ha! Really? My foot sweat will make it all the sweeter." She laughed and lifted a dripping foot, pointing it towards him. "Wanna taste?"

"Ugh. Put it back in. Not done yet."

They laughed and she returned her foot to the water, splashing happily while playing on her omni-tool.

"What are you doing?" he asked

"Sending a message to Solana."

"Your Turian friend?"

"Yeah."

"Tell her 'Thanks' for me."

"Eh? Why?"

"Well, she helped you when you were hospitalized on Palaven, right?"

"Oh. For that? Nah. She was just doing her job… She's got a brother here on the Citadel. He's in C-Sec."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah. He sounds a lot like you – except without the boy-scout streak."

"Ha. Someday, you'll settle down with kids and a husband. And, you won't mind the boy-scouts so much."

"Riiiiiiight. The same day you spend more time with a girl than a rifle."

"Bite me."

"Love you too, Jo-Jo."

* * *

The two days on the Citadel went by faster than either of them could have imagined. They were scheduled to depart for the Kilimanjaro early the next day and decided to take a last stroll around a garden that was supposed to simulate the natural environment of Sur'kesh.

The garden, they learned, was an area for Council races. The Council took turns designing the flora and fauna and it was a relaxing, beautiful environment, despite the alien feel. Shepard and Maggie were walking the paths and talking together when Shepard's omni-tool beeped, demanding attention. He, as usual, ignored it.

"Aren't you going to check that?" Maggie asked, peering at his wrist.

"It can wait."

"But, it was marked Urgent."

"How do you know?" he asked accusingly.

"The tone of the alert. It's different when it's an Urgent message."

"Huh. I never noticed."

Maggie slapped her forehead. "I swear when it comes to technology you're a lost cause."

They fell silent for a minute and Maggie flicked her own omni-tool to life.

"Well, if you're not gonna check it, then I will," she threatened with a smile.

"Oh, hell no! You are not hacking my accounts again," he growled, grabbing at her wrist. She twisted and darted away, laughing.

"Oh, I totally am!" She jumped the edge of the path and jogged across the alien grass-like lawns as the Station VI reminded her to "Please stay on the path."

Her fingers flicked over the interface of her omni-tool like lightning. Shepard chased her to the edge of the path, frowning at the VI. She looked up from her omni-tool, meeting his eyes with a grin, daring him to come after her. Shepard narrowed his eyes.

Challenge accepted.

She suddenly turned and ran into the garden at a sprint and Shepard cursed under his breath before running after her.

"Please stay on the path," repeated the VI.

"Oh, suck a goat!" Maggie hollered at the VI as she broke into an awkward run to keep ahead of her brother. Her pace was hampered by her fingers still moving on her omni-tool. Shepard easily overtook her and she zig-zagged ahead of him, wriggling out of grappling range. She was all laughter and taunts while Shepard pursued her with dogged determination.

He finally tackled her into the ground and they both tumbled laughing. The brief hand-to-hand sparring session ended as it always did. Maggie got in a few quick taps, but even her speed couldn't counteract her brother's size, reach, and training. In the end, Shepard screwed up Maggie's omni-tool arm behind her back and pinned her face down to the grass-like flooring with expert precision.

"Agh! Uncle uncle!" She squealed with laughter, wriggling against his grip. He released her arm and stood over her, with a smug and satisfied smile.

"Ass." She muttered, smiling up at him as she rubbed her shoulder. "Frickin' advanced combat hand-to-hand training is not allowed in tag."

"How exactly am I supposed to not be trained?"

"Not my problem, you big cheater," she smirked. He was about to come up with some witty retort when her omni-tool beeped and she looked down at the display, ignoring him.

"You should really check your messages, John. You got your next posting."

He scowled.

"You got into my messages? That fast? Damnit, Mags!"

He would've continued but the strange and profoundly proud smile on her face stopped him. He sighed and lifted his wrist to look at his omni-tool. He took a moment to read and then shrugged.

"I guess I won't see Mom for Thanksgiving. I'm to report ASAP to the SSV Normandy."

"I know." Maggie looked up at him, that strange grin on her face growing even wider.

"I've never heard of the Normandy. But, Anderson requested me," he muttered, offering a hand to help her back to her feet. She took it and she bounced excitedly as he pulled her up.

"I know," she repeated. Her grin threatened to pull her face in half.

"Anything you'd like to share?" he asked skeptically, eyeing her.

"No," she chirped happily.

"Brat." He muttered, nudging her back to the path.

"Love you too – now go get packed."


	4. Chapter 1: The Citadel

"_**Many men can make a fortune, but very few can build a family." - J.S. Bryan**_

Some people, Kaidan decided, should not be allowed to flirt. Or, maybe the Alliance should offer a tutorial vid on the practice.

It was the view that had prompted the young Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko to vainly attempt engaging his new squad in conversation. He simply couldn't look away from the city-size arms spreading into the abyss. His fellow Marines had nearly walked right past the picture-perfect sight in their steadfast determination to accomplish the mission. But, the strange hue of the artificial light was nearly identical to sunrise over the bay bordering his childhood home. Kaidan smiled to himself, remembering his parent's deck and the hours spent drinking beer. So, he'd tried to point out the beauty of the scene.

Instead, Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams had steered the conversation to "tin-foil mini-skirts" and "thigh-high boots" in the galaxy's lamest attempt at flirting. All Kaidan could do was shake his head and try to hide his sniggering.

"That will be enough, Chief."

He tried to prevent Williams from earning herself an Article 134 court martial for fraternization. Apparently, the Commander didn't notice.

"I can't see her in a skirt anyway." Shepard had dismissed the remarks in a neutral tone. Williams looked like she wanted to kick herself.

"Damn straight you can't," she retorted lamely, trying to salvage a hint of dignity.

He eyed her with a smirk. "Ready to move out, Commander."

Kaidan couldn't blame her for the attempt. Commander Shepard was a handsome man. Their XO rested his forearms on the railing of the Citadel upper wards, emphasizing his lean and muscular form. His dark and intense eyes were gazing out at the speeding rapid transit cars and the star-speckled space beyond. Not that Williams was bad looking, she just couldn't compare to an N7.

Despite the team's eagerness to move on to the Med-Clinic, Kaidan took a moment as he stared across the view of the Citadel to reflect on the whirlwind of events in his life recently.

Six weeks before, Kaidan had been sitting on that very same deck watching the water and drinking beer with his father. He could still remember his cousins' laughter, practicing hockey shots against the garage while his uncles argued about some sports team or another. Sports never held much interest for him, but there was a strange comfort to the ritual. It was that peaceful moment when his mother answered the call and he'd received notice of his new assignment on the Normandy. Alliance Command had canceled his Thanksgiving leave and he'd left immediately.

That still left him bitter. Commander Shepard, Corporal Jenkins, and his new crew had met him at the construction docks orbiting Palaven for a crash-course in the handling of their new prototype ship. Together, the new squad had spent Thanksgiving with a new Normandy family, instead of their own. To impress his new team, Kaidan had insisted on cooking.

"You want me to sit here and watch you cook Thanksgiving dinner?" Jenkins had asked, incredulous.

"You're not watching me cook, you're helping me drink beer," he had rebuked him.

Shepard had praised him for creating a passable Thanksgiving meal from a handful of MREs and alcohol. He called it "Canadian black magic." That still made Kaidan swell with pride.

_Beef, bacon and beer...The foods of my people._ Alenko grinned to himself.

They were all prepped to leave on the maiden voyage when word came down that they were to wait for the arrival of one more crew member; a Turian Spectre named Nihlus. So, they waited and celebrated the new year of 2183 on the Normandy. Their hangovers had barely cleared when the legend himself arrived and they were en route for Eden Prime.

Kaidan avoided the shudder that ran through him at the thought of Eden Prime and spared an involuntary glance back at Gunnery Chief Williams. He knew that must be tough, being the lone survivor and watching your entire unit die around you. Another thing she had in common with the Commander. He was quietly impressed that the Marine was keeping her outward appearance so casual. He suspected her flirtatious attempts were just her way of dealing with the turmoil that lurked beneath the surface. She hid it well, but he knew better.

_Poor Jenkins._

Kaidan sighed inwardly. He'd never be comfortable with losing soldiers. He bit down on the emotions, trying to focus on the lives he saved rather than the one he failed.

"Sir?" Chief Williams prompted the Commander. Kaidan shook his head to pull himself from his thoughts, sharing a quick glance with Shepard. His commanding officer offered him a wan smile.

"Yeah. Alright. Let's go find our wayward investigator. What was his name again?"

"Garrus Vakarian," said Kaidan.

"A Turian," added Williams reproachfully.

"I don't care if he's a bloody elephant in tutu as long as he can help us," Shepard snapped. Kaidan saw the Chief step back from him, wounded and Shepard looked away guiltily.

He stepped in calmly, always acting as the peace-maker. "Med-clinic is this way."

* * *

The adrenaline was still pumping hard in time with Commander Shepard's racing heart after the unexpected firefight in the Med-clinic. He whirled on the C-Sec agent who was addressing him.

"What were you thinking? You could have hit the hostage!" He growled.

"There wasn't time to think. I just reacted."

Shepard took a deep breath, counted to ten, and put his commanding officer mask back into place. The doctor was fine. He could deal with the feelings later. It was time to work.

But, apparently the C-sec Investigator was doing most of the work for him. He stepped back and watched the Turian handle the police work, only rejoining the conversation when Officer Vakarian had confirmed their lead on Saren's activities.

He was halfway to the door when the Turian caught his attention.

"This is your show Shepard. But, I want to take Saren down as much as you do. I'm coming with you."

Shepard heard Williams suck in an angry breath behind him and that made him smile. The Turian had balls...or whatever the raptor-turkey equivalent was. He didn't ask "may I come with you?" or "permission to assist, sir!" It was simply, "I'm coming with you."

Simple. Direct. Brazen. Cocky.

_Good attitude. He's like Dirty Harry. _Shepard smiled to himself.

"You're a Turian. Why do you want to bring him down?" Shepard prompted, testing the waters with this new comer.

"I couldn't find the proof I needed in my investigation, but I knew what was really going on. Saren is a traitor to the Council and a disgrace to my people."

The passion and anger was a physical sensation in the C-Sec officer's voice and Shepard wondered if that was the Turian subharmonic communication his sister had talked about.

"Welcome aboard, Officer Vakarian." Shepard said with a smile, offering his hand to the Turian.

And, to his surprise, the Turian took it with a firm and confident shake. Vakarian's grip was strong and strangely practiced at the awkward gesture of clasping three taloned fingers into five stubby ones. But, Shepard felt the careful restraint; the physically dominant species deliberately displaying strength without crushing his bones to pulp. You could tell a lot about a man by his handshake, human or otherwise.

_I think I'm gonna like this kid._

* * *

C-Sec Investigations Officer Garrus Vakarian had begun his day, like most other days, sitting behind a desk listening to his incompetent co-workers make racist and xenophobic jokes while ignoring the piles of cases on their desks. Restless and angry, the Turian stomped away from his office and his paperwork. Instead, he headed for the lead at the Med-Clinic; ignoring the procedures _and _his supervisors. When he made that brash decision, he knew it'd mean another write-up - but, he didn't know it would mean a firefight, illegally scanning keepers, and storming into Chora's Den for a another firefight.

It turned out to be the best decision of his life.

Determined and focused silence dominated the small skycar that whisked Commander Shepard, Garrus Vakarian, and the newly acquired Urdnot Wrex towards Chora's Den. The trio was undoubtedly sporting for a fight. Garrus quietly prepped his rifle on his lap while studying the human out of the corner of his eye. There was an air of certainty about the Commander and sense of deadly purpose that drew the young Turian. Shepard was so unlike the hand-wringing bureaucratic boot-lickers that oversaw his work at C-Sec. The Commander's simple, steady presence inspired a trust and loyalty brewing in his chest that Garrus was completely at a loss to define.

_This is what a born leader must look like._ Garrus thought to himself enviously.

Shepard glanced at Garrus, noticing the stare. He figured the C-Sec officer might be nervous so he tried to take the edge off.

"How long have you been with C-Sec, Vakarian?" he asked conversationally as his fingers moved over his own assault rifle.

"Five years. Ever since my service ended."

Shepard nodded. He tried to remember what his sister told him about Turian compulsory military service: boot camp at fifteen, plus seven years of active service, plus five in C-Sec. That put Vakarian's age at about 27, only two years younger than himself and just a year older than his sister. With that realization, Shepard felt a sudden determination that no harm would come to this investigator under his command.

"You see a lot of action?"

"Enough." Garrus responded with a casual confidence he didn't feel.

"I've never fought with a Turian before. Anything I should know?"

Garrus paused and peered at the Commander his mandibles flaring into a menacing Turian grin as he cocked his rifle.

"You'll never see my back." he joked, making reference to the common saying about Turian military discipline.

"Good. I'll never see your ugly face either. You'll be on my six." Shepard responded with a fierce grin of his own and two laughed together.

Wrex shook his head, grumbling. "This is why I work alone..."

The transport landed and the trio drew their weapons as they approached.

"Let's move. See you on the other side."

* * *

After twenty-one keepers, three fire-fights, two arrests, an illegal arms deal, a self-aware gambling AI, and a dramatic Council confrontation; the first Human Spectre was itching to punch something.

Shepard forced a smile while he shook hands and exchanged courtesies with onlookers in the Council chambers, all mobbing around him to congratulate him on his fresh and shiny Spectre status. He genuinely tried to share the overwhelming enthusiasm of becoming the first Human Spectre, but the whole dirty business left a bad taste in his mouth. He was suddenly very grateful for the giant Krogan looming menacingly at his side, dissuading any more brown-nosers from approaching him.

"Not bad, for a Human," Urdnot Wrex rumbled at his side. If Shepard didn't know any better, he'd almost think the giant Krogan was complimenting him.

"It's just a title," Shepard replied evasively.

"Titles don't help in a fight."

Between the visions of genocide, the political infighting, Ambassador Udina's infuriating bullshit, and running laps around the Citadel on stupid errands for hours, Shepard was rapidly losing his self control. Until he felt, rather than heard, the reassuring presence of the Turian C-Sec Officer at his back.

"Through all my time in C-Sec, I-I never got the chance to witness a meeting of the Council in person." Garrus observed with an unmistakable excitement in his voice. The Turian's giddiness helped to calm his rising fury.

"Happy to oblige."

They both looked up almost in unison at the sound of approaching footsteps, revealing Lieutenant Alenko leading Williams and a very uncomfortable looking Tali'Zorah Nar Rayya towards them.

The Lieutenant offered his hand to Sheppard.

"Congratulations, sir. A big win for all of humanity"

Shepard shook hands with Alenko, assuming his Commander air once more. "It was a team effort. I owe you.." he paused there and met the gaze of each team member in turn, falling on Garrus last "...all of you. A great deal of thanks. I couldn't have done it without you."

"Thank you, Commander" The Quarian's helmet speakers echoed as her odd three-fingered hands fiddled nervously.

"So… skipper," Chief Williams interjected. "I think this deserves a toast. Come on back to the Normandy and we'll celebrate with the crew."

Shepard shifted uneasily, rubbing a hand behind the back of his neck. His eyes scanned towards exits for a possible excuses to avoid any more smoke being blown up his ass.

"I... well..." he began awkwardly.

"I'm sorry, Chief Williams." Vakarian stepped in smoothly, placing an armored hand on Shepard's shoulder. "Wrex and I already asked the Commander to drinks to blow off some steam … buy a few dances…" he leered at Wrex who smirked and rumbled his accent.

"Yeah. Could use a drink." The giant Krogan confirmed.

Shepard could have kissed that Turian right there and then.

"You are welcome to join us down in Chora's Den…" the C-Sec Officer continued jovially, completely ignoring the look of discomfort from Williams.

"No. No, thank you," she responded quickly. "I don't really think that's my scene...with the strippers and all."

"Ms. Tali….Lieutenant?" Garrus offered with a mandible-flaring roguish Turian smile.


	5. Chapter 2: The Consort

"So, a Turian, a Krogan, a Quarian and two humans walk into a bar…" Garrus Vakarian began as he placed the round of various dextro-amino and levo-amino drinks around the table.

"Is that some kind of a joke?" Lieutenant Alenko asked skeptically.

The Turian's mandibles tightened against his jaw, frowning.

"Well… ah. Yeah. It kinda was."

The awkward silence was broken by a chuckle from the Commander as he reached for his drink.

"I don't know if it's ever happened before. Probably why you haven't heard the joke, Lieutenant." Shepard chided with a smile.

After the drinks were distributed, Kaidan raised his glass to Shepard.

"To the first human Spectre!" he offered as a toast.

"Here here!" echoed Garrus.

"Keelah!" cheered Tali.

"Shepard," said Wrex with a nod.

They all clinked glasses and took sips, except for Shepard and Wrex who maintained eye contact with each other while swallowing the whole drink in one long pull. Shepard finished first and they both slammed the glasses back to the table, laughing.

Kaidan frowned at the Commander before raising his own glass to him again in acknowledgment. "Any CO who can drink like that can call me Kaidan."

"Any human who can't drink like that is weak," put in Wrex, sagely.

Shepard looked at his empty glass and shrugged.

"Marines," he muttered as if that explained everything.

The Quarian fumbled with her straw attachment to her suit and peered up at Shepard a curious tilt to her helmet.

"Marines?"

"Marines are soldiers….we tend to drink a lot." Shepard offered solemnly by way of explanation."It's… uhmm… traditional."

That got a snicker from Alenko. As if to demonstrate the point, the Krogan quickly turned his attention to a second drink.

Vakarian slid another drink in front of the Commander who nodded his thanks, impressed at the foresight of the Turian. They both fell silent and stared in quiet appreciation of the wriggling Asari dancers. Tali and Alenko chattered about some new tech gizmo, with Vakarian contributing occasionally.

Meanwhile, the giant Krogan Battlemaster shamelessly propositioned every Asari who came within reach; and, even some who didn't. Eventually, he seemed to land a prospect by virtue of sheer tenacity. He lifted his drink in mock salute to the table, laughing.

"So long no-humps. Message me when it's time for a fight." He offered in parting before following the Asari into the back.

"Ugh. Do all men become bags of hormones when Asari wiggle their butts?" sighed Tali as she watched the Krogan depart.

Vakarian and Shepard shared a quiet glance, hiding their smiles behind their drinks.

"No no… not at all!" The Lieutenant raced to the defense of men everywhere. "The Krogan is a bad example of how to treat a lady."

When Tali offered examples of misbehavior among males and Kaidan started to explain chivalry, Shepard decided it was time for another drink. He had no interest in participating in the battle of the cross-species sexes. He mumbled his excuses and headed for the bar.

He was waiting on the bartender when he heard the C-Sec Officer settle next to him.

"Excellent exit strategy, Commander."

"Ha. I don't think it was needed. They won't notice we've left for an hour at least." He paused, paid the bartender, and slid another drink to the Turian. Shepard turned and surveyed the bar, pausing to smile at a human who eyed him up and down appreciatively as she walked by.

"Last time I was on the Citadel, I was with my sister. Not exactly a good time to visit a place like this." Shepard motioned about the scene of Chora's Den with a laugh, watching the woman walk away with amusement.

"Ah." The Turian purred, following Shepard's gaze with a hint of mischief in his subharmonics. "In which case, I'm sure you'll want to see the Consort."

"Yeah. I heard about her. Never paid for it, never will."

Vakarian laughed heartily at Shepard's stern tone. "She doesn't always operate like that. You'd be surprised."

"You've seen her before?"

The young Turian coughed into a taloned fist. "Ah ha ha. No. But, you work at C-Sec long enough you learn these things."

"I'm gonna need to be a lot drunker for this."

Both men laughed.

"Challenge accepted, Commander."

Many rounds of liquid courage later, Shepard found himself teetering on his feet in the lobby of the Consort. He wasn't exactly sure, in his alcohol-fueled haze, what happened next. Something about a three month waiting list, which turned out to be five minutes when the acolyte started talking to someone through an invisible earpiece.

He vaguely recalled staring at an amazing set of blue tits during some conversation or another before the C-Sec Investigator dragged him back to Chora's Den for another round of drinks. In their absence, Alenko and the Quarian had progressed their argument to the dance floor and the Lieutenant's flailing armored dance moves was a sight that even alcohol couldn't purge from Shepard's mind.

Though, he did also remember Garrus practically swallowing his tongue with laughter when he told some Turian General to man up and find his balls (did Turians have balls? He never did find out.) Then, they stoked up some badass classic Earth tunes, drunkenly headbanging all the way back to the Presidium.

Somehow, at the end of all of it, he wound up alone and naked in the presence of a tall Asari who made other Asari turn extra blue with envy.

_Maybe, there was something to this Spectre gig after all._

* * *

Her name was Sha'ira - and she was a professional. She'd known most every species of Council space in the most intimate of settings for over 300 years. She'd been there when the Humans first arrived and had been one of the first to greet them. She'd even brokered back door settlements that helped end the violence of the Relay 314 incident. She was especially proud of that.

So, when the first Human Spectre and the poster boy for Humanity shows up in her bed, drunker than a Krogan on Genophage day and starts rubbing at her nipples like a fumbling child, she couldn't help but laugh. It was the best entertainment she'd had in a century.

Shepard's fumbling was eager and ardent, but clumsy. He had never been with an Asari; that much was clear. But, it wasn't about skill and pleasure for Sha'ira these days. She'd had enough pleasure for six lifetimes. What she was after, was experience. Every man, woman, and some in-between that she'd serviced had taught her something; and, she hoped her subtle gifts had guided them on their journeys. The purpose of the joining had little to do with her own wants, she simply used their bodies to touch into the oceans of energies beyond and transformed those energies into words. The words they needed to hear, paving the way to great destinies.

Shepard was a soldier; hard, fierce, and lethal. But, he knew when to relax. It was impossible to be anything but relaxed with the Consort stretched languidly beneath him in that strange domed bed. She was sporting an even stranger amused smile as the first Human Spectre dragged the tip of his tongue along the length of her glassy azure body. Eventually, his tongue moved to that most unusual mouth - the one whose contours were almost, but not quite, those of a human woman's.

Asari were hairless - an evolutionary adaptation in the warm, still climate of Thessia. The quality and texture of her skin was different too; less forgiving to a mouth. She explored him in return; her fingertips pressed hard while smoother than a human's and nearly frictionless. Shepard got the eerie sense she was toying with him; but, through the drunken haze it still counted as a win in his book.

After fifteen minutes of his floundering attempts, the Asari grasped his wrist and intertwined her fingers between his, guiding him. Slowly, she showed him how to explore her body and revealed the fullness of her labyrinth and which paths might lead her to eternity. The unfamiliar contours of her most delicate of entrances was alien. It took Shepard minutes to realize, as he sent fingers snaking down slick yielding tunnels, that her body was not designed for reproduction; but for pleasure. Pure, free, unrestrained, and unashamed pleasure.

As she shifted, stretched, and groaned, all with that preternatural Asari grace, the Commander felt her arousal begin to mount. His hands moved over and inside of her with fluid ease. It was a strange sensation. Sha'ira was not precisely wet as he expected. Instead, he felt an easy hyper-smoothness that rippled across his fingertips. Shepard had felt that slight give somewhere before; standing in dry dock at N-School as they pushed him through the subtle pressure of a mass effect field.

Damn.

Suddenly, he understood why other men had joked about in the barracks "Stay true to blue." _Everything _was biotic with them.

Shepard shivered with anticipation and couldn't restrain himself any longer, eagerly pushing his hips between her supple thighs.

In one swift motion, the Consort turned the tables; tightening her legs around him and flipping him onto his back. Shepard blamed the alcohol for an Asari half his weight managing to grapple him. But then again, she probably had centuries of experience in this particular take down move. Sha'ira mounted him with an agonizing slowness, despite his hungry urging, and firmly placed her blue hands on either side of his skull, forcing his eyes to meet her own. Her hips rocked into him and he groaned with a pleasure that rocketed through his whole body. Her pupils dilated wide until the black consumed her eyes.

"Embrace Eternity."

Suddenly, his nerves were on fire and the muscles of his whole body were tingling with stimulation, and his breasts… wait… what!?

The realization made them both spasm against each other and Sha'ira slapped a hand against the dome to hold herself in place. Shepard could feel his own hips, straining and rolling with her in quick, bucking strokes and he could feel every inch of her pleasure as well, it was guiding him to push onwards.

He couldn't tell which direction was up or down, gravity had ceased to have an effect and he was tumbling with her, buried in her, and floating amongst the stars with her. With her body at least, somehow he felt her consciousness was reaching far deeper into the currents and oceans of galaxies than he could comprehend. The truth was he really didn't care. He was a Human man who got to experience multiple orgasams; it was the best sex of his life.

"By the goddess…"

She panted after their nervous systems disengaged. Shepard was a trembling mass of jelly, his body twitching while his mind slowly reintegrated into it. Sha'ira looked down at him, a perplexed and terrified look crossing her face. She touched his cheek lightly.

"Such burdens for one so young…"

The Consort sounded wistful and sad, a distant remorse in her tones. Shepard hardly heard her over the pounding of his own heart in his ears. His chest was heaving and his entire focus was on keeping his sweaty, trembling, body from melting into the mattress.

"B-Burdens?"

The Consort ignored him and rolled out of the bed. She shrugged into a robe and proceed to the sideboard. She needed a drink for the first time in decades.

Sha'ira had glanced at Shepard's paths. His journey was something she'd rather not have seen. She placed his armor at the edge of the bed and left the man to dress as she proceeded to pour herself a heavy drink. She nursed it slowly and allowed herself to process the dark future and pain she'd witnessed, trying to siphon out the path, the _words_, that would steer him true.

Shepard tried to sit up, but his limbs felt like lead. Strangely, he felt very sober. How long had it been? He waited until gravity felt as if it had returned to normal before sliding back into his under-weave and bit-by-bit latching himself back into his armor. It was a lengthy process. By the time he'd finished, the Consort was waiting calmly for him near the door.

"I offer a gift of words, Commander. An affirmation of who you are, and who you will become... I see you, your uniform fits as though you were born wearing it. You are a soldier through and through, proud, solitary, alone. But, it gives you strength. That strength is what kept you alive when everyone around you was dying. You alone survived. You will continue to survive. This may be who you are, but it is not who you will become. It only forms the basis for your future greatness. Remember these words when doubt descends, Commander."

She had also placed a small piece of Prothean technology into his hand. She hoped it would prove useful to him.

"What is it?" Shepard asked.

"A small mystery. I have never learned it's use or purpose, but I sense it is time for me to pass it on. And now, I must ask you to leave, Commander. I have done everything I can for you."

Shepard blinked as she took his arm. He was stunned, confused, still basking in the afterglow and felt like an ass for just walking away. But, she was leading him to the door.

"Sha'ira… thank you.. but…"

"Remember my words, Commander Shepard. Look to your family for understanding. A family you will build, not sire, on your journey. They will give you strength."

And, with that, she closed the door behind him.

Shepard stared at the door a moment, looked down at the trinket in his hands, then back at the door. He knew somehow her words were supposed to have deep meaning, like some kind of ritual. Her understanding of his background was odd, but nothing that couldn't be pulled from the extra-net. Part of him wondered if this was her great scam, blending the boundaries between spiritualist and sexual healing. But, she hadn't charged him.

_A family I will build, huh?_

* * *

Garrus woke up groggily when he heard the doors from the Consort's chambers open, trying to figure out how and why there was an Asari acolyte sleeping across his lap and another Human acolyte under his arm. They were all three clothed, he noted with faint disappointment. For the second time that evening, Garrus had passed the time in the waiting area while Shepard met with the Consort. Except, this time, he was pretty sure he had passed out.

Garrus started to put the broken pieces of memory together. The first visit only resulted in going back to Chora's Den. The Commander insulted some Turian General while Garrus had piled the drunken Alenko and Tali into a transport. He vaguely recalled the Quarian singing, but that couldn't have been right. The details afterwards were fuzzy, but he thought he remembered an Elcor. Then, he was reminded of Shepard drunkenly daring him to hack the Avina terminal based on some ancient Human music and he groaned.

The Commander walked down the stairs from the Consort's chambers steadily and met Garrus' eye with a smirk, raising an eyebrow at the Human and the Asari sleeping precariously on top of him. No words needed to be said. Garrus extracted himself from the pile and fell into step behind him.

"Shepard, I don't know about you, but maybe we could swing by the Med-clinic on our way to the Normandy." Garrus mumbled holding his head.

"Can't hold your liquor, Garrus?" Shepard asked laughing. There was an undeniable pep in his step that made the Turian mutter darkly under his breath.

_When did he start calling me Garrus? _he thought to himself blearily. _And why is he so frickin' chipper?_

Garrus paused and looked over his shoulder at the giggling acolytes of the Consort chamber.

_Oh. Right. That's why._

"Just because I want some hangover meds doesn't mean I can't hold my liquor." The Turian grumbled irritably, wincing from the light of the presidium.

Shepard was looking at him thoughtfully, like he was coming to a weighty conclusion. Garrus squirmed under his scrutinizing gaze. They'd only been working together a matter of days, but the implicit understanding was uncanny.

"How long?" Garrus asked.

"Three years plus. Since N-School. You?"

"Still counting."

"Damn… I thought those acolytes…" he left the rest unsaid when Garrus shot him a grumpy and hung-over glare.

Without a word, they moved together towards the transports, passing the Avina interface. Shepard paused to give a nearby keeper a poke.

"Please do not fear the reapers" the VI chimed.

Shepard burst out laughing and slapped a hand on Garrus' shoulder; an unexpected gesture of familiarity.

"Excellent job, Garrus! Next time have her say "More Cowbell,' " the Spectre grinned, enthusiastically.

Garrus, despite his hangover, smiled at the Commander.

"I was reeeeaaally hoping I had dreamed that part of last night..." Garrus sighed as they piled into a transport, heading for the C-Sec docking bays. "...But you made me listen to the song on your omni-tool and threatened me with violence...How could I refuse?"

Shepard grinned like a school-boy, punching Garrus lightly in the arm.

"Still want to go back to C-Sec?"

Garrus laughed.

"No, Shepard. I think you're stuck with me."


	6. Chapter 3: The Normandy

Shepard was a survivor; but, that didn't make him a leader.

Through over ten years of military service, four of those in N-7 training, and three deep space tours, Shepard still couldn't define what made a good leader.

But, he knew soldiers.

Shepard was proud to be a soldier, a true soldier. Wearing the uniform didn't magically transform the man or woman beneath it. There were plenty of shit birds in the Alliance. Bullies, gang members, drop-outs, or struggling colonists with no other options. They'd do their jobs, they'd follow orders. But, that didn't make them soldiers.

Real soldiers didn't fight for a cause or an agenda. They understood the mission for what it really was. Necessity. They fought for the man on their right and the family back at home. If they were lucky, they even got to return home to see them.

Shepard didn't expect his men to put their asses on the line for anything he wouldn't gladly do himself. So, he made it a point to learn about his team, to talk to them every day, to remind them about the man on their right and the family back at home as often as possible. Shepard never wanted to tell his crew "Go Boys Go" when facing danger. For him, it would always be "Come boys, follow me."

Then, there was Garrus. Alien or not, he was a soldier.

As Shepard made his rounds through the Normandy, he always saved his conversations with the Turian for last. It gave him something to look forward to. Garrus was a hell of a soldier, but he wasn't one of his team in the same sense as the others. Garrus chose to join. Wrex chose to join as well, but he was driven more by a need for violence. Tali had a debt of honor and a shameless obsession with his drive core. The others were Alliance military through and through. But, Shepard had an immediate understanding with the Turian that put him instantly at ease.

The C-Sec Officer had a brilliant tactical mind, an equally impressive sense of humor, and believed in him without the doting admiration of a subordinate. The Turian provided the mutual respect and advice of a friend and it was something Shepard sorely needed in the unfamiliar freedom of "Spectre-hood."

It was about two weeks since they left the Citadel. The team had taken a few odd-jobs, making a slow and circuitous route to Knossos system to find a missing Dr. T'soni. Shepard wanted to get a feel for the team and their abilities before he led them into some kind of serious firefight. He was cautious and calculating with the risks. He knew all too-well the consequences of being unprepared. Akuze had seen to that. Prepared or not, they were two days out from the system, according to Joker.

The next day they were scheduled for a few hours on Eden Prime to let Chief Williams bury her grief and to remind the rest of the crew the stakes they were fighting for. Shepard also wanted to reassure himself that the settlement was secure. He had re-established communication his sister and learned her unit in the 4th Division of the Engineering Corps was heading to Eden Prime to help with reconstruction. The last thing he wanted was an undiscovered Geth putting bullets into Maggie while she had her head in a defense matrix of some kind.

Unfortunately, it seemed like Gunnery Chief Williams had misunderstood the gesture and Shepard felt like an even bigger ass for misleading his subordinate into dangerous Article 134 territory. He was going to have to deal with that soon and it was probably going to be ugly. The situation was sticky enough that Shepard decided to handle it in the most Human and manly way possible. That is, he avoided the conversation entirely.

_I'd rather deal with Geth than women…_ Shepard muttered to himself darkly as he ducked his head into the Mako's engines with the former C-Sec officer.

"Thanks for bringing me on board, Commander" Garrus greeted Shepard. "I knew working with a Spectre would be better than life at C-Sec."

Shepard sighed with relief. What a breath of fresh air a "thank you" was compared to the rest of his rounds that evening. He gave Garrus an understanding nod of acknowledgement.

"Have you worked with a Spectre before?" he carried on casually.

"Well no, but I know what they're like. Spectres make their own rules. You're free to handle things your way."

Shepard chuckled at how misinformed _that _assumption truly was. But, he listened regardless as Garrus carried on complaining about C-Sec rules and bureaucratic red-tape. Shepard tried to defend the regulations and admitted that his arguments seemed weak, even to him. But, when Garrus got a bit over-eager about doing the job "his way," Shepard stood firm.

"If getting the job done means endangering innocent people, then no. We get the job done right; not fast." He said in his unshakeable "Commander" tone.

"I wasn't trying to….I understand, Commander." The Turian slumped.

Shepard nodded at that and started to head back for the elevator. He got a few steps and then paused as a thought struck him.

_He sounds a lot like you – except without the boy-scout streak._ His sister's voice echoed in memory.

He turned back to the Turian.

"I know this is probably a long-shot…But, you wouldn't happen to have a sister who's a nurse in Cipritine, would you?"

Garrus looked up, mandibles twitching, clearly disconcerted.

"She's in med-training… yeah." he answered, clearly suspicious.

"Solena? Solana? Something like that?"

Garrus pulled himself up to his full height and took a step toward the Commander. Shepard was tall, like his father, so he had been told. But, even at average height for a Turian, Garrus still had a few inches on him and he used them to loom menacingly.

"Solana. And, if you are threatening her or _any_ of my family…" Garrus began, a growl punctuating his words.

_Oh, for the love of…_

Shepard sighed and put up his hands in a placating gesture.

"No no… Absolutely not, Garrus. It's just…well, _my_ sister said...Good god, I'm going to need a drink to have this conversation," he said, pinching the bridge of his nose between his fingers.

A few hours and several drinks later Garrus and Shepard were seated on the floor of the Commander's cabin with two bottles and a two glasses between them, laughing so hard both of their sides hurt.

"So, your sister….They thought she just got too friendly with the locals?" Garrus asked between huffing laughs.

Shepard laughed with him.

"That's what the doctors thought. She swore up and down it wasn't the case. I even gave her grief about making out with Turians off-duty."

"Oh… spirits! That's rich..." Garrus paused to refill both their glasses from the respective bottles. "...But, she was allergic to Varren? Really?"

"Yup. Your sister was the only one who caught it, apparently. Insisted they do a dexto-amino whatever test..." Shepard's laughter suddenly faded and he stared down somberly at his drink. "...Probably saved her damn life."

"Wow." Garrus mused, pride touching his subharmonic tones. "I can see why they would become friends afterwards..." The Turian also looked down at his drink, remorse slipping into his voice. "...I guess I haven't been in touch with my sister much since I've been on the Citadel."

Garrus paused for a long moment, thinking about his family and the fresh anger that still gnawed at him. His father hadn't taken the news of his C-Sec resignation well.

"My sister and I made a promise to catch-up every month… after…." Shepard sighed and lay back on the floor. "...well...we had lost touch for awhile. Maybe, you should do something like that too."

"Yeah. Maybe."

The silence stretched as they studied their drinks and their thoughts. The two men shared the companionable quiet, listening to the hum of the Normandy's engines as minutes ticked by.

"Hey, Garrus?" Shepard prompted.

"Mnhf?"

"You think the universe is mocking us? I mean, what are the odds that our sisters would be friends and that… well… we'd end up working together?"

Garrus barked out a laugh. "Out of the trillions of Turians and trillions of Humans. Pretty bad odds. But, if the universe is mocking us, well, we can mock it right back."

Shepard sat up slowly and semi-drunkenly, reaching for his glass with a slight groan of effort. "Oh yeah? I'm pretty sure it's bigger and meaner than the two of us."

Garrus nudged Shepard's glass across the floor to him. Shepard picked it up with a nod of thanks.

"But, not nearly so good looking." Garrus retorted, grinning with a menacing Turian flare.

Shepard took one look at him and nearly folded in half laughing.

"Me, maybe. But, you're just a bad movie monster."

"Ahh… Don't be jealous, Shepard. You'll grow some fringe and style someday."

Shepard straightened himself with a smirk and clinked glasses with Garrus.

"Sure, brother. Whatever helps you sleep at night."

* * *

Shepard involuntarily twitched at the sound of gunfire. It was a familiar sound in an unfamiliar circumstance.

He held his formal salute stiffly, uncomfortable in his formal dress Alliance Blues, waiting patiently for the cessation of the twenty-one gun salute. The new fastenings indicating his command of the Normandy glittered prettily in the Eden Prime sun as the friends and family gathered to pay their respects to Corporal Richard L. Jenkins.

He held the salute through the presentation of the flag and the playing of the Alliance anthem. He had never been to a military funeral for his own soldier before. He was grateful that Lieutenant Alenko had attended with him. The two of them caused quite the stir. Some muttered curses for the Alliance failure to protect the colony, but more offered outspoken praise for their assistance and sacrifice in Eden Prime's defense. A young boy, Jenkins' little brother, stared at Shepard specifically, his eyes puffy from tears and his lower lip trembling. His gaze made Shepard even more uncomfortable.

After the funeral, Shepard offered his respects to the family. He offered solemn formal salutes and instead was pulled into friendly hugs and handshakes. The Commander was stunned.

_They're thanking me for failing their son? Grief affects everyone differently, I suppose._

Jenkins' father was firm in his handshake and his words. "Kill 'em. Kill 'em all for my boy."

"Yes sir." It was all Shepard could think to say.

Kaidan and Shepard walked together in reflective silence back to the spaceport after the funeral. Shepard was lost in his thoughts, counting all the men he'd lost, reciting each of their names in his mind and adding Jenkins to the list.

_You will honor them, John Shepard._

Damn straight he would. He'll decorate their graves with Saren's entrails. If Turians have entrails...they got to have right? How would they eat without….

Shepard was wrenched from his thoughts by the sound of movement approaching from behind. He stopped suddenly and turned, his eyes scanning the path suspiciously.

"Commander, is something wrong?" Kaidan asked.

"I heard something."

Shepard drew his sidearm and Kaidan concentrated, his biotics flaring to life. A heartbeat later the young boy from the funeral came running into view. Shepard immediately holstered his weapon and took a few anxious steps towards the boy.

"Mr. Commander, sir!" The child called after them.

"What happened? Is something wrong?"

"No… I…" he panted to catch his breath and looked back and forth between the two Marines uncertainly.

"Take your time, kid."

The boy was shaking. He couldn't have been more than six years old. He had the same sandy brown hair and bright blue eyes as Jenkins, but his face was streaked with tears.

"Sir… I just… why did they kill Rich? Why… why would they do this! We didn't do anything to them! They _attacked_ us!"

Shepard took a deep breath and knelt before child. He was tall so it brought him to eye level with the boy's tear-filled eyes. He gently placed his hands on the child's shoulders.

"It was a man who did this. A lost and angry person. Your brother was very brave and died trying to stop him. He died protecting you and your family."

"But, what if there are more people like him?"

"That's why we have to be good to each other. To stop bad people before they start."

"But, you'll stop them? When there are bad people?"

"Me and Kaidan here and a lot of other good men and women in the Alliance just like your brother. We'll stop them."

"It doesn't matter - we're moving back to Earth. Dad said it isn't safe here."

"We'll make it safe for you to come back."

Shepard made the statement confidently, without missing a beat. The boy stared up at him in awed silence for a moment before throwing his arms around Shepard's neck. The Commander hesitated before hugging him back softly. The boy reminded him of his own sibling. It made Shepard's chest ache to think of some other Marine attending his funeral, comforting his own sister like this. Then again, Maggie would probably be throwing punches.

Shepard sent the boy on his way home and it was only afterward that he realized Ashley had been watching the whole scene from the spaceport. The Gunnery Chief fell into pace next to him and Kaidan as they made their way back to the Normandy. The scowl on her face was vicious.

"It wasn't a _man _who did this. It was a Turian," she growled.

"Turians are not different or special. They're jerks and saints, just like us." Kaidan said quickly and with an intense fervor that made the Commander glance at him.

"Well said, Kaidan," Shepard said with a smile.

Ashley looked like she was about to argue; but, she caught the way Shepard was looking at Kaidan. If only the Commander would look at her that way. Kaidan smiled up at Shepard with a hint of a embarrassment and Shepard patted the Lieutenant on the back.

"Humanity and the Turians both could probably use a few less jerks. We'll consider this mission community service."

"Killing as community service? You're an ass, Shepard."

"Did you just call you CO an ass, Lieutenant?"

"No, I called my friend an ass. Pssh. Talk about sensitive."

They laughed together all the way back to the Normandy with Ashley stewing bitterly just behind them.

* * *

"I.. I know things are different aboard the Normandy; but I'm concerned about the aliens...Vakarian and Wrex. With all due respect Commander, should they have full access to the ship?"

Shepard immediately regretted his previous statements about 'open door policies' as he tried to allay the Gunnery Chief's xenophobic concerns. He knew she wasn't the only one aboard who felt that way. Presley had been forthcoming with his concerns and he knew quite a few of the Normandy's support crew had lost family in the First Contact War. He navigated the murky waters of Ashley's touchy feelings with extreme caution.

"I… don't think kissing Turians will be necessary, Williams."

_This is why I don't date; women are so bloody complicated. _Shepard grumbled to himself.

"You never know, Commander."

_Awkward..._

Shepard started to turn away, this conversation had gotten far too weird, far too quickly.

"Commander? Just one more thing…"

"Yes?"

"Thank you for stopping back at Eden Prime. I know you didn't have to. But, it helped a lot….to...to say goodbye to my squad like that."

"Glad I could help, Williams."

"It helped Alenko, too. Making sure Jenkins got to be buried at home."

Shepard took a second look at the Gunnery Chief. He hadn't realized she was so close with Kaidan. The Lieutenant had ultimately convinced Shepard to attend the funeral. Strangely enough, their presence at the service seemed to really bolster the colony. The survivors took great pride in the fact that the first Human Spectre had paid his respects to one of their own.

It had taught him a lot about the Lieutenant, too. Especially after the night of somber drinking following the funeral, he would count the fellow Marine as a friend. He still remembered the look on the face of Jenkins' little brother. It broke his heart. His voice was choked as he tried to slip away.

"Sure, Williams."

"How did you get over Akuze?" Ashley blurted out suddenly, her cheeks turning pink the moment she realized how stupid she was being. But, now she couldn't stop herself from babbling.

"I mean… if it's ok to ask… I-If you don't want to talk about it, I understand. I just…. it's hard, you know? I just thought… maybe… we could talk to each other about more than… well… the mission."

"If it's all the same to you… I'd rather not talk about it."

"I understand, Commander."

Ashley tried to catch his eyes. Shepard's thousand-mile stare was looking right past her, already turning away. His voice seemed haunted.

"We'll talk later, Williams."

Ashley winced sympathetically as she watched him walk away.

_No one should have to go through that alone…_The Gunnery Chief sighed to herself.

* * *

_**Authors note:**_

_**Drksyders here! Another loving shout-out to Roarkshop in this chapter. The lines "Go boys go" and "Come boys, follow me" references a famous quote used in Sense and Flexibility, Chapter 9.**_


	7. Chapter 4: Therum

**_Author's note:_**

**_Drksyders here! I just wanted to apologize for missing our chapter post last week. Entirely my fault! I was out of town, added some last minute changes, and life just got in the way. I promise I'll do my best to not let it happen again! Thanks again for all your comments, faves, follows, etc. Feel free to drop us messages! We like hearing from ya'll! 3_**

* * *

"_You can't step on the red ones, Garrus - they're lava!"_

"_Can I shoot the red ones?"_

_Solana shrugged. "I don't see why not."_

Lava is not nearly as much fun in person.

The memories of childhood games came unbidden to Garrus' adrenaline-fueled thoughts. He seriously regretted not contacting his family like Shepard had repeatedly suggested.

Between Shepard's lava-friendly driving, defense turrets, a small army of Geth, and then a Krogan Battlemaster, Garrus' life had flashed before his eyes so many times he was at risk of developing perfect recall like a Drell. He refused to allow the slightest hint of fear crack is cool exterior and his bantering with the Commander kept the panic at bay. He was coming to realize just how much he was reveling in the moments of violence; ridding the high of the adrenaline and the heightened focus of the danger.

He'd never felt more alive.

Following Shepard's mad visions was the clearest path to saving lives Garrus had ever seen. As he ran for his life just behind the Commander and just in front of an erupting volcano, it occurred to the Turian that he would never, ever, return to his life at C-Sec.

He was right where he was supposed to be.

Garrus pulled himself up to his feet and immediately surveyed the state of the ground team. Shepard was lifting the Asari, Dr. T'soni, back to her feet and they both seemed to be unhurt. He moved to Alenko to help the Lieutenant back to his feet. They both stumbled as the Normandy shook, just outrunning the exploding volcano behind them. The cargo bay doors had barely locked into place when Joker's mocking tone crackled over the intercom.

"Too close Commander, ten more seconds and we would have been swimming in molten sulfur. The Normandy isn't equipped to land in exploding volcanoes. They tend to fry our sensors and melt our hull. Just for future reference."

Garrus and Kaidan shared a look and the Lieutenant rolled his eyes. They both turned to look at the Commander who was talking in hushed tones to the Asari, his hands hadn't disengaged from her sides. Garrus smirked to himself at the scene. Kaidan took a step, starting to move towards them. Garrus grabbed the Lieutenant by the elbow, obviously startling the man.

"Why… don't you help me check on damage to the Mako, Lieutenant Alenko. We can catch up with the Commander at the debrief." Garrus rumbled, the subtle protective threat of his subharmonics completely lost on the Human.

Kaidan frowned at Garrus then glanced over at the Commander whose entire attention seemed to be focused on the Asari in his arms.

"Ah. Yeah. Right, Garrus," he finally caught on and allowed himself to be pulled off to the opposite side of the cargo bay by the Turian.

Garrus glanced over his shoulder at the Commander who was now hugging the distraught Asari.

_He defeats a Battlemaster, squares up the mission, and saves the girl...like a bloody video game,_ Garrus chuckled to himself.

* * *

That night, alone in her borrowed sleeper pod, Dr. Liara T'soni tried to remember her mother. It wasn't because Benezia was a traitor, though, it was still abundantly clear the rest of the Normandy crew were very concerned about _that _fact. Instead, Liara found herself actually trying to remember her mother's lessons, specifically the techniques and litany to control the boundaries of her own mind.

The joining was complicated, delicate, and exhausting. The whole process was made even more difficult by Liara's complete inexperience. She'd never joined with a Human before, well, in truth she'd never really joined with anyone before outside of her basic juvenile training. Part of her still worried that she'd made a mistake and somehow corrupted the data from the Prothean beacon while transferring it from the Commander's frail human mind into her own. Then again, the Commander's will was the most forceful thing she'd ever encountered. Perhaps the data wasn't the problem.

The Commander's mind was strong. So strong, in fact, that she'd been entirely unprepared and unshielded. The boundaries between their two identities had blurred. The Prothean visions from Eden Prime had seeped into her mind along with dozens of other memories, emotions, subconscious thoughts, and unspoken wishes. She'd glimpsed deep and private parts of the Commander's essence. As she tried to find her way to sleep, those pieces invaded her mind. No matter how hard Liara tried, she couldn't re-establish the boundaries between her own identity and the shadows of resigned nobility left by the Commander.

One name from Shepard's thoughts repeated itself in a flurry of protective anxiety over and over again; Maggie.

Distraction was the solution, she decided eventually. She needed something that could allow her to refocus. The stars. She needed to see the stars. It took her longer than it probably should have to orient herself on the alien frigate, but eventually she'd found her way to the cockpit.

"Whoa! Asari on the bridge. Should I salute or something?"

Liara nearly threw a biotic blast in automatic response to the unseen voice because it startled her so thoroughly. Apparently, Human ships utilized a stationary oversized workstation that kept the pilot hidden until she was practically standing on top of him. The odd and strangely informal greeting originated from another Alliance crew-member that she hadn't met. The man was sitting at his station, eating sweet-smelling discs from a bag. Liara recognized the voice and struggled to find the appropriate response.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize anyone was here. I just wished to see the stars. Am I not supposed to be here? I'll leave… my apologies."

She turned as if to go, but the pilot stopped her.

"Hey, no regs against looking at the view. Help yourself."

"Thank you." Liara stepped forward and stood quietly next to the helmsmen. She stared out at the passing stars.

Joker craned his neck to look up at the newest addition to the Normandy crew. He certainly wasn't an expert at aliens, but it didn't take a psych wizard to see that this particular Asari was not in a happy place. He chewed thoughtfully on the homemade snickerdoodle cookies (a gift from his mother) and decided to stick his nose where it wasn't wanted, as usual.

"You look like you got something on your mind." He held out the paper sack and offered the Asari a cookie. "Have a cookie and tell your Uncle Joker all about it."

Liara glanced at the man and cautiously accepted a cookie.

"It's nothing of importance. Just, the joining, is difficult to control and I am... not very experienced. I received more than just the beacon visions from the Commander's mind. Other thoughts, feelings, even memories."

Joker raised an eyebrow.

"So, you got into the Commander's head? Like...literally?"

Liara could almost feel herself blushing and she looked away.

"He is an intense and powerful man," she answered evasively.

"Wow," Joker considered this a moment as he took another bite of cookie. When he spoke again, his mouth was full. "Whad'd you see inmf dere?"

"I'm not sure that's appropriate…"

"Awww… come on! I gave you a cookie!"

Liara looked at the cookie still untouched in her fingers and took a tentative nibble. Her eyes widened and she looked at Joker again with an expression of amazed enjoyment. The doctor then proceeded to devour the baked treat eagerly, licking sugar crumbs from her fingers.

"See? They're called snickerdoodles. My ma made them," Joker gloated.

"Snickerdoodles," Liara repeated thoughtfully. "They are very good."

"Mom'll be glad to hear that… So, now you can't hold out on me. What was in Shepard's head?"

"Well, the Commander has many powerful emotions. I think Humans experience emotions much more strongly than Asari do. But, I felt a strong protective affection for a woman….Maggie."

Joker barely managed to hide his eye-rolling. That was definitely disappointment in the Asari's tone. Time to double up the wing-man duties.

"Oh, right. Maggie? That's his sister. She calls all the time, kind of snarky - but, I wouldn't know anyone like that. Cute, though."

"His….sister?" The Asari sounded completely relieved.

_Good grief._ Joker grumbled to himself. _She's like a school-girl with a crush._

"Yup. Shepard is a great guy. Takes care of his sister, volunteers with homeless kittens, rescues Asari maidens from the forces of rogue Spectres - all around pillar of humanity he is."

"I see. You respect him greatly."

"Absolutely. We all do. You know he's single, right?"

From behind them, Shepard's bass voice rang out like an emergency klaxon.

"Who's single?" The Commander asked as he approached.

Liara's spine stiffened and her eyes widened like a deer in the headlights.

"I am," Joker responded without missing a beat. He dropped his head, stooped his shoulders, and slowly turned back to the controls, shaking his head sadly. "So very, _very_, single," he muttered.

Shepard and Liara both stood in awkward silence. Liara cleared her throat.

"*ahem* Commander, I had some findings I wished to discuss with you, if you have a moment?"

Shepard stepped slowly backwards away from his pilot. "Right, uhmm… absolutely. Let's talk downstairs."

Joker glanced over his shoulder and watched Shepard and Liara walk together through the CIC.

"You're welcome, Commander," he snickered to himself.

Downstairs, in the mess hall, Ashley waited. She was hoping to catch the Commander as he headed to his quarters. She jumped to her feet when the Shepard rounded the corner, gingerly stepping towards him, but she came up short when she realized he was following Dr. T'soni to her quarters. He didn't even see the Gunnery Chief. His eyes were locked on a swaying Asari posterior.

Ashley cursed irritably under her breath as she stood, deflated, in the center of the mess.

"Something on your mind, Chief?"

It was Kaidan's voice that called to her. The Lieutenant was looking at her from his weapon's bench, sleeves rolled up past his elbows revealing lean and muscular forearms. The genuine look of concern in his soft brown eyes managed to stifle Ashley's growing anger. She blew out an irritated breath and approached the biotic.

"God, did you see the way he looked at her ass?"

Kaidan chuckled quietly to himself, only ruffling the Gunnery Chief even more. "Was he? I didn't notice."

"It's disgusting - she's not even human." Ashley complained.

"Close enough," Alenko returned with a shrug. "You can't blame him. Afterall, you know what they say. Biotics do it better."

Ashley scoffed. "Where did you hear that from?"

Kaidan glanced up at his fellow Marine with a lopsided smirk. "From satisfied customers."

That managed to draw a laugh from Ashley. "We're talking about combat, right?'

"All sorts of combat…"

She shook her head as if she refused to admit the implications of Kaidan's jibe.

"Does that mean you charge for your service?"

"I'd never charge you, Chief. On the house."

"You're a pig, Alenko."

_Canadian bacon_. Kaidan smirked to himself. But, out loud he said "You know you love it."

Ashley rolls her eyes and waved a hand dismissively at the Lieutenant. "Goodnight, Porky."

Kaidan grinned at her. "Sweet dreams, Williams."

* * *

Hours after most of the crew had begun their sleep cycles, Garrus was still buzzing with adrenaline and nervous energy from the fight on Therum. As a soldier, he could sleep almost anywhere if he really set his mind to it. But, it was his mind that was the problem. So many, many, things had run through his head during the fight (thankfully none of them bullets) and he barely had time to process what he had experienced.

It was his first real mission with the Commander and he was pretty sure it had changed his life. Fiddling with the Mako at this time of night would certainly disturb Wrex sleeping in the cargo bay. So, he decided to take his weapons up to the mess hall for a complete disassembling and cleaning. The weapons needed it after the dust and mess of the fight and it gave him something to do with his talons while his thoughts wandered.

Garrus passed Lieutenant Alenko as he emerged from the elevator. They glanced at each other briefly. Garrus nodded politely. Kaidan looked at the weapons and shook his head wearily.

"Do Turians ever stop working?" Kaidan asked.

"Sure. Sometimes we're asleep. Other times, we're pulling lazy humans out of exploding volcanoes," Garrus quipped jovially.

Kaidan chuckled appreciatively. "That sounds like work to me. This lazy human is hitting the sack. Goodnight, Vakarian."

"Goodnight, Alenko."

Garrus watched the biotic go and smiled to himself proudly. The Normandy was very different from a Turian military ship, but he was pleased to be settling in and falling into the easy camaraderie of the team. He settled himself at a table, spreading out cloth, gun oil, rags and brushes in a familiar pattern, like setting an altar for a religious rite with the modified Mantis sniper rifle in the center. He gave the rifle an affectionate pat before he started to disassemble it and clean each part.

He'd only been working for a few minutes when he noticed movement in the med-bay. He glanced up and saw the Commander leaving what had been hastily set up as Liara's quarters. His mandibles fluttered slightly as he fought his smile, pretending not to notice the Commander who emerged into the mess hall and looked startled to see him. Garrus looked pointedly at his work, scraping off a chunk of lava caked to his gun and ignoring Shepard like it was a mission.

"Garrus…" the Commander seemed to chide him like an older brother. "What are you doing up?"

Garrus looked up at the Commander his mandibles clicking as if to say "really?" then looked pointedly back to his rifle and back to Shepard once again.

"Ah. Good idea. Mind if join you?"

"It's your ship, Commander."

Garrus slid the gun oil closer to the opposite side of the table and tossed a few spare rags as well. Shepard went to his locker and came back a moment later with his assault rifle and shotgun. He sat across from Garrus and quickly got to work. Before long, the table was covered with gun parts, dirty rags and cleaning brushes in an organized chaos of pieces.

"So, how's the good doctor settling in?" Garrus probed, unable to stop the teasing tone from infiltrating his sub-vocal communication.

Shepard pretended not to notice the implications. "She's just shaken up from the experience is all. And, taking the news of her mother's treachery pretty well."

Garrus winced, suddenly regretting his teasing. Liara had been through alot and Shepard didn't need any grief.

"Well, it certainly got pretty intense down there today."

"It did..." Shepard confirmed. "...was more than we bargained for. You did good though, Garrus. I couldn't have done it without you."

Shepard's tone was suddenly serious, his hands had stopped cleaning the gun component in his hand. He looked directly at the Turian.

Garrus looked up at him and felt a fierce warmth spreading across his chest at the compliment. They stared at each other a moment and Garrus nodded stiffly as if to acknowledge the unspoken conversation that passed between them before looking back at his own cleaning efforts.

"Of course you could have, Shepard. Just not as stylishly, of course."

Shepard laughed and returned to his cleaning. The good-natured teasing eased the tension from them both. They settled into amused and quiet conversation, complementing each other on particular heroics from the encounters that afternoon.

"It's really a design flaw. I mean, they put that flashlight in the middle of their head like the center of a target. It just makes hitting the processing core all the easier." Garrus bragged.

Shepard laughed and nodded towards the sniper rifle.

"Design flaw or not. Impressive shooting..." Shepard paused and stared at the rifle. "...Huh. Garrus, what's that?"

Shepard indicated a small metallic plate, about the size of a dog tag mounted on the stock of the rifle.

"Oh, that?" Garrus spun the gun around to look at it. "My _Kahw-rieal_… pretty much all Turians have one."

"Your what? I think my translator just cursed at me."

Garrus' mandibles seemed to jerk in multiple directions as he thought.

"I don't know how to explain it. It's something your family gives when a Turian leaves for their service. Usually, your father gives it to you."

Shepard frowned at the unmistakable hurt in Garrus' voice. You didn't have to be a Turian to hear that one. He tried to sidestep the subject.

"Huh. Really. You know, I think my sister got me one."

"What? Really?"

"Yeah. She said _your_ sister helped."

He pulled out a chain from under his shirt and revealed his dog tags. A third and oddly shaped piece of metal of a distinctly different hue hung next to his tags. The corners were cut off and blunted. The thin metal had unmistakably Turian writing that glittered on both sides. He pulled the whole set over his head and handed them to Garrus.

Garrus took the set from across the table and peered at it closely. He realized his sister had probably also held this same _Kahw-rieal_ helping a man she had never met for a Human she called a friend. A warm Turian smile passed over his face and mandibles as he examined it.

"Spirits! So, she did!" He laughed softly. "I assume that isn't a normal gift for Humans."

"She got it for me while she was on Palaven. I really didn't know what it was. But, it was a Christmas gift and it looked like a dog tag so I just attached it."

Garrus tilted his head curiously at Shepard.

"A what gift? I think _my_ translator just cursed at me."

"Christmas… it's a holiday to celebrate winter and rebirth and… you know what? Nevermind."

Garrus shrugged his shoulders at that.

"Just say a Human thing. I get it. Like a _Kahw-rieal_ is a Turian thing. It symbolizes the end of childhood, fulfilling your role and duty as a Turian. It marks your entry into service. Most Turian weapons have a slot for them and most Turians always keep it on their weapon...like so.." he demonstrated by flipping his rifle over once more to show his own _Kahw-rieal_ in the base of his rifle.

"..It's like… keeping the spirits of your family close...to protect you."

Shepard smiled at that and held up his own kawh-whatever next to Garrus'. He inspected them together and noticed the similar decoration and color; almost like Garrus' face tattoos while the alien markings differed in the center. Garrus watched him curiously, mandibles clicking in thought.

"So, what does it say? What about the designs around the side - they look like yours and your face." Shepard asked finally, looking up at the Turian.

Garrus smiled and held out a talon for the item in question and Shepard dropped the bundle of tags into his palm once again. Garrus pointed at the markings with a claw.

"The 'designs' as you call them are the clan markings. She got this made in Cipritine, it's the capital where I was born."

Shepard smiled at him and nodded at him to continue, obviously interested. Garrus felt strangely proud that Shepard would take such an interest in his people.

"Well, the first line is your name and the second here...these are are your parents names," he pointed to the second line and paused as he tried to sound out the strange phonic spelling.

"Han-Han-naar Heard-master and Wealthy Heard-master?"

Shepard sputtered with laughter.

"Hannah and Rico…Shepard… yeah… ok. I can see translation doesn't work so well."

Garrus chuckled and continued. "This is your birthplace. Seems to be a ship name. SSV Mountain?"

Shepard smiled and nodded. "SSV Fuji… named after a mountain. So, close enough."

Garrus pointed. "This is your birth date..." He noted the date and smirked. "...You're younger than I thought."

"Shut up, ya upstart kid." Shepard muttered with a fake elderly sound to his tone.

"And, this is where your _lares_ is: Yours just says 'Alliance.' "

"Translator?"

"Oh right. _Lares_ it's… like your family spirit. Every family has one, some even keep a small altar in their home. It's a word, phrase, a name or image sometimes. Different for every family. Some new bond mates create their own when they create their own family. Older and prominent families have very famous _lares_ that are adopted by others in their service."

"Ha. Alliance is our family's spirit all right. I guess Maggie put a lot of thought into this."

He paused for a moment and looked up at Garrus. "What's your family's _laawres_?" Shepard tried to pronounce the unfamiliar word.

Garrus' mandibles pulled tight into his face and Shepard recognized the defensive gesture. He immediately tried to back-peddle out of the question.

"Look… sorry. I didn't mean to pry. If I overstepped…"

"Strength through duty." Garrus cut him off, the words semi-bitter in his mouth. He dropped his eyes and almost looked ashamed.

Shepard blinked at the Turian. For the first time, the impact of his leaving C-Sec to join him on the Normandy really struck him. Shepard sighed and looked at the hurt in his friend, placing a reassuring hand on his armored shoulder, hoping it would help.

He let the silence hang for a moment before nudging the Turian to wrestle him out of his dark thoughts.

"So, what about the other side?"

"Uh. Right…." Garrus blinked a few times to settle himself then spun the tag over.

"...It's generally just a personal message, one that doesn't get seen when mounted." He stared at the text and read aloud.

"_Honor them with life."_

Shepard went completely still. His eyes locked on the piece of metal in the Turian's three taloned hand. Garrus recognized the oddly Turian response to surprise. Predators froze and assessed the threat while prey bolted. He coughed softly into his hand and returned the bundle of tags to Shepard's hand. He made a point to move slowly, not wanting to trigger any aggression from the Human. They both seemed to understand that the conversation had taken them to dark places. But, there was a strange comfort in the mutual sadness and a mutual understanding to go no further.

"Well, it's getting late…" Garrus began as he started packing up the rifle and cleaning supplies. The weapons were reassembled long ago though he didn't fully remember completing the task.

"Yeah…" Shepard muttered, obviously distracted, thumbing the piece of metal. Garrus started to head for the elevator with his rifle and cleaning kit in tow.

"Hey, Garrus?"

"Yeah, Shepard?"

"You think you can get one of those plate things for my rifle? To mount it like yours?"

Garrus smiled. "Absolutely. I'll rig it myself."

"Thanks, Garrus."

"Goodnight, Shepard."


	8. Chapter 5: Luna

**Chapter 5: Luna**

Garrus had never been particularly fond of approaching a CO, but serving on the Normandy under Commander Shepard was not exactly what most Turians would call "typical."

Since joining up with the first Human Spectre, there had been a completely a-typical friendship – born of good-natured ego bruising and the Commander's unceasing commitment to the crew. When added to their uncanny symmetry in combat, trust and friendship were a natural progression. Garrus had never had a friendship that felt so comfortable. In truth, he hadn't had many friends at all, which made the camaraderie with Shepard all the more unique.

So, he experienced only the mildest hesitation to bring the datapad of weapon modifications up to Shepard's personal quarters. He only half-expected the Commander to be there, since he'd been spending so much time with the Asari doctor lately.

The door whisked open at his approach and Garrus immediately heard the Commander's laughter floating through the room. The sound caused him to hesitate at the door. The Turian looked up from his datapad to find Shepard seated in front of his terminal on a vidcall with another human. Shepard glanced at Garrus and held up a hand off-screen, clearly indicating for Garrus to wait. So he did, standing at an awkward military at-ease as the doors closed behind him.

"…and then..." continued a warm and lively feminine voice from the terminal; "...he was wearing the goddamn mustache on his face. Just standing there grinning at the old bastard wearing his own bloody face fuzz!" The voice collapsed into breathless laughter and the Commander joined with his own deep chortles. There was a moment of shared mirth with undeniable closeness and curiosity prompted Garrus to lean forward slightly and look at the screen.

Garrus noticed the vidcall screen filled with a dark but smiling human female. The detective in him immediately noted the details: medium height, slender build, dark hair, almond shaped red-brown eyes, tanned skin, sergeant's insignia on a..._gray_ uniform? Hadn't seen that before. As he put the details together, she instantly reminded him of Shepard. Their coloring was similar and the set of her eyes mirrored the Commander's.

"Look, Mags. You'll have to tell me how it shakes down later. I got work to do. Do you have everything you need?"

Garrus frowned slightly, displeased that he interrupted what was obviously a personal moment for the Commander.

"Yesssir...Lord Spectre Commander Jo-Jo," said the woman on the screen with a devious and teasing smirk. "I'll have the encryptions you need in a few hours. I'll let you get back to work, then."

Shepard looked back to see Garrus peering at the screen. Garrus noticed his gaze and jerked back to attention; mandibles flaring into a smile.

_Lord Spectre Commander Jo-Jo? hah! That's rich. _Garrus snickered to himself.

"Take care of yourself. Don't be late." said the Commander, starting to rise from his seat.

"Punctuality is for people with nothing better to do. Smell ya later!" giggled the woman on the screen before it went dark.

There was an awkward pause as Shepard walked towards Garrus. He rolled out his shoulder preparing for the expected teasing from the Turian who kept his loose stance of attention as an even greater snub. It seemed to encapsulate the easy friendship between them. Shepard flashed him a smirk and reached for the offered datapad.

"At ease, _Officer_ _Vakarian_." he said, sarcasm dripping from his tone.

"Oh! Sorry to interrupt, _Lord Spectre Commander_…you requested data on possible weapons modifications?"

Shepard shook his head with a smile. Accepting his fate, he began to scan the datapad. He kept walking towards the door as he read, Garrus falling into step behind him.

"So…. Was that your sister?" Garrus asked.

"Yup," Shepard responded without looking up.

"I expect you'll be taking some shore-leave after we hit Luna - to visit?"

"Nyope."

Garrus blinked at that. "I thought you two got along."

"We do - but she's on Eden Prime."

"Eden Prime?" echoed the Turian, a twinge of uneasiness in his sub-vocal rumblings. "The attack…was she..."

Shepard shook his head, still evaluating the data pad in front of him, his steps taking him towards Kaidan.

"No no. Her team was sent after the attack. 'The Marines blow it up and the Engineers fix it up' she says."

"Ah... I thought your family was all about the Alliance?"

"Maggie does her own thing."

"You do your own thing, too. You're a Spectre." Garrus pointed out lightly.

Shepard studied the Turian. "Heh...I suppose I do. Hey, Kaidan - look lively." This last part was directed at the Lieutenant.

Kaidan wiped his brow with his wrist, turning to face the approaching pair.

"Anything you need, Commander?"

Shepard nodded and tossed the datapad in front of the Lieutenant pointing to a particularly robust pistol mod.

"_This_, I must have for my Razer. It'll make me look like Dirty Harry."

Kaidan chuckled appreciatively. "Yeah. I think we can get that for you."

"What? You want to get your pistol dirty?" Garrus asked, looking back and forth between the humans obviously confused.

Shepard and Kaidan laughed at Garrus, who crossed his arms and leaned back on his heel. He was not sharing in their amusement.

"Dirty Harry..." Alenko explained patiently, "...he's an old cop from the classic vids."

Shepard nodded agreement. "You'd like him," he added.

"Why would I like him if he's dirty?" Garrus asked, obviously taken aback.

Shepard rolled his eyes. "You just will. Kaidan, do you have a copy?"

"Ah, I used to. But, I'll try and track one down. Anything else, Commander?"

Shepard gave Garrus a pat on the shoulder. "Whatever the overgrown buzzard here recommends."

Garrus' armored chest puffed out at the gesture of confidence in his abilities and he turned to watch the Commander head eagerly towards med-bay. He traded a look with Kaidan and they both smiled knowingly, watching the Commander through the windows before he disappeared into Liara's quarters.

"So, about these other mods…" Garrus rumbled.

* * *

After destroying the exterior turrets on the rogue lunar training base, Shepard, Garrus, and Tali swung out of the Mako and bounced along in Luna's weak gravity towards the bunker entrance. Much to their surprise, Shepard was actually checking his omni-tool as he positioned himself defensively against the wall. Garrus took position on the opposite wall and Tali waited patiently by Shepard. Minutes went by. Garrus tapped his talons on his rifle impatiently.

Eventually, Shepard's omni-tool pinged brightly and Shepard turned to his wrist.

"Late as usual," Shepard muttered. Garrus and Tali shared a look.

With a few awkward keystrokes on the device, Shepard linked the audio into their comms.

"Commander Shepard here." He answered stoically.

"Hey, Spectre-Man. We doin' this?" a happy computer modulated female voice intoned over their Comm link.

"Are you scrambled?" the Commander responded seriously.

"Does a Hanar have tentacles?"

"Fine fine. Tali, Garrus - We got a virtual ride-along for this one. This is -" He trailed off.

"Call me Ishmael!" boomed the computer voice in their ears. Garrus swore computer modulated laughter was just plain creepy.

"Can we just focus…. wait...really? Ishmael?"

"Oracle?" the voice suggested.

"Right - Like you could pull off Barbara Gordon," replied the Commander's sarcastic tone.

"Absolutely I could." The voice sounded affronted.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, Commander," Garrus muttered, "but is that a _civilian_?"

Garrus did his best to catch the Commander's eyes through the covering of his helmet. He had a sneaking suspicion whose voice was suddenly buzzing in their helmets. Shepard shifted uncomfortably away from Garrus' accusing gaze.

"Not exactly…_Barbara _can get into serious trouble for helping us. I'm asking you both for your silence on this one. But, she's got the extra intel on this and I'd rather have the extra help. I completed the training at this facility when the VI was friendly and it was no easy task."

Garrus nodded. "Understood, Commander."

"Shepard, I didn't think we were facing anything _that_ dangerous," Tali murmured uncomfortably.

The computer modulated voice known as "Barbara" chimed-in.

"This facility was designed to train N-School candidates in close quarters combat. It can modulate gravity, atmosphere, environment, and even can do bad-ass laser light show to Pink Floyd."

Garrus and Tali both looked pointedly at Shepard to elaborate and he shook his head.

"_Barbara…_" he growled, there was a warning to his tone.

"Oh right. So, I don't know which knucklehead fucked with the VI system, but you're looking at between 40-60 advanced combat drones with rockets, assault drones with shield overload capabilities, and heavy turrets with kinetic barriers. There are three bunkers with three different VI conduits you'll need to take offline." There was an unmistakable hint of pride in the computerized voice.

"Spirits…" hissed Garrus.

Shepard continued, all business. "Anything else we should know about?"

"I've managed to override the door controls now."

Right on cue the door opened for them and Shepard drew his assault rifle, leaning out of cover just enough to peer down the hallway. The voice paused, with unmistakable concern.

"All the safety protocols on the rockets have been overridden. John, please be careful."

"Noted. Moving in now."

* * *

Shepard had struggled with the decision about whether or not to patch in Maggie, or rather _Barbara_, for this particular mission. He knew her inside understanding of the operations of the base would be invaluable, but he also knew the risk to her career by leaking proprietary information from a military contractor. After three different bunkers of death-spraying drones, he wondered how he even hesitated in the first place.

"Rocket target lock!" her computer modulated voice called. Shepard immediately rolled and felt the heat of the rocket trail through his armor as it ripped the air less than a foot away. Garrus popped out of cover and put a round through the offending drone while Tali's hacked drone interposed itself between them. It was a challenge to pick out targets through the gas hanging thick in the corridors, but Shepard's deadly marksmanship released small bursts of fire with ruthless efficiency. In concert with Garrus' high impact shots, not a single bullet missed.

A few more minutes of cat and mouse in the gas destroyed the final drone. Shepard pulled out his shotgun to hammer down the last kinetic barriers and blew a satisfying hole in the last VI Conduit.

"VI signal is no longer active." Tali reported with nod of her helmet.

Maggie apparently changed the modulated tone to her computer voice down a few octaves before she pronounced in a long over-dramatic announcer voice, "Kaaaay-Ooooh"

Shepard chuckled at her antics as he rummaged around through boxes, looking for anything worth taking while they were there. And, as per Maggie's request, he copied all the data he could find. Garrus and Tali stepped to the side, discussing some techno-babble about the VI behavior. Shepard had to check that his translator was operational since the techie conversation currently taking place sounded like Greek to him.

"Barbara" was uncharacteristically quiet after she reviewed the final sputtering output of the crippled VI.

Eventually, they climbed their way out of the bunker and bobbed along back to the Mako.

"Are you guys in a rush?" asked Maggie over the comms.

"Maybe… why?" came Shepard's cautious reply.

"Just something I thought you'd like to see. Sending coordinates now."

"What exactly is this "something"?" Garrus asked skeptically.

Maggie's computer-modulated voice very clearly giggled.

_Computers should never giggle. _Garrus thought with a shudder.

"You'll see." She chimed. "Good hunting out there! Over and out."

Shepard paused and peered up at the Earth hanging in the stars above the horizon of Luna's surface, laughing softly as he read the message that popped up on his omni-tool.

"What is it?" Tali asked curiously as she climbed the steps into the Mako.

"Have you ever heard of a human named Neil Armstrong?"

"Who?" Garrus and Tali asked in unison.

"You'll see." Shepard echoed. "Tali. Move over, I'm driving. Consider this a history lesson."

* * *

"You'll see. Good hunting out there! Over and out."

From Eden Prime, the youngest Shepard hunched over her private terminal in the barracks. Maggie forced her voice to be positive, upbeat, and playful as she signed off, disconnecting the pirated extra-net connection to her brother's omni-tool. She pulled off the headset, shook out her hair, and frowned at the data they'd lifted from the Luna base.

That final message still gave her the chills.

She'd been glancing over the code as she followed her brother's mission remotely, using his omni-tool to hack into the various systems and keep a firewall operational against the VI's electronic incursions. Then, Shepard had forwarded her the data files he stole.

_Rogue VI my ass._ Maggie growled to herself as she looked over the data. _I'd stake credits that Cerberus has their bloody claws in this._

She was so engrossed in the illicit information that she didn't even notice the two heavily armed Military Police Officers who appeared in her doorway.

"Staff Sergeant Shepard?" The MP prompted from the doorway.

Maggie looked over her shoulder and frowned.

"That didn't take long."

* * *

Shepard, as usual, visited Garrus last on his rounds. They were two days out from Noveria, according to Joker.

"Commander," Garrus greeted him from his back as he slid out from under the Mako. "How are you?"

"You message your family yet?" Shepard demanded with a smile, leaning against the Mako, arms crossed over his chest and looking down at the Turian on his back.

Garrus glared at him with a subtle growl and then started to slide underneath the Mako once more. Shepard rolled his eyes and stepped his boot on the hovering creeper, preventing Garrus from disappearing into his work.

"Fine… I'll drop it." Shepard grumped. "But, why did you want to be a C-Sec officer in the first place?"

Garrus sighed and pushed the creeper away from the Mako, wiping his talons on a nearby rag as he sat up. "That's a good question...There were several reasons I guess."

Shepard sat on the floor next to the Turian, leaning back against the tires of the Mako. "Like what?" he asked.

"Probably the same as most officers." Garrus shrugged his armored shoulders, mimicking the human gesture. "I wanted to fight injustice; I wanted to help people." he paused and looked down at his talons. "I guess my father had something to do with it too. He was C-Sec; one of the best…"

Shepard was surprised to learn that Garrus' father was a C-Sec legend and that Garrus himself had been targeted for Spectre training. The tension between father and son reminded him a lot of his own family; the way his sister and his mother butted heads about the Alliance.

_Different amino-acids, different species, different planets, same problems. _Shepard thought to himself with a smile.

"Just because you can break the rules doesn't mean you should." Shepard chided, laughing to himself inwardly at how he'd said the same thing to his sister at his graduation years ago. "I don't need to stoop to Saren's level to stop him. And, neither do you Garrus." he added.

"I see what you mean...but… I'll think about it." Garrus muttered.

Shepard frowned at the dark expression on the Turian's plates. "Hey - why don't we set up the bags? I could use the exercise."

"Yeah - sure. Going a little stir crazy trapped inside such a tiny ship for weeks."

"Are you kidding? I grew up on ships like this following my mother's postings as a kid. The Normandy feels just like home. Being on something as big as the Citadel for too long makes me twitchy."

They moved together in the familiar pattern to set up the punching bags and padded mats that composed the Normandy's exercise equipment. The set-up was flimsy at best, the heavy bag hanging from a series of poles locked into place by unstable folding joints jury-rigged for the task. It was pretty much impossible to use the set-up solo for risk of the swinging bag taking the entire rickety structure apart.

Garrus stepped behind the bag first, offering Shepard the first go, but with a valiant and exaggerated sweep of his arm, Shepard yielded the honor to the Turian. They both shared a laugh as Shepard rolled out his shoulder.

Garrus warmed up with some light jabs - his larger frame and armor making his strikes relatively heavy and slow. He began to circle the bag slowly, delivering blows and Shepard moved with him.

"About your dad…" Shepard began as they circled, "...Don't let his disappointment get to you. You're family first, even if leaving C-Sec isn't what he wanted for you - eventually he'll trust what you want for yourself."

"I'm not sure it's that simple, Shepard. He's pretty stubborn. Once he's got something in his sights, he doesn't let it go."

Shepard peered around the bag with a smirk. "That could describe another Turian I know."

Garrus huffed out a breath and punched the bag with extra force, sending Shepard reeling back a pace, laughing.

"But he's my father. It's family honor at stake if I go against his wishes. I was never a very good Turian."

The Commander shrugged. "I was always the good soldier in my family. It was my sister who caused the trouble. We are Alliance marines through and through. About a month into basic training, she left the outfit. When my mom found out, it was the fight heard 'round the galaxy."

"That sounds like fights I've had with my father. They get ugly." With a nod, Garrus stepped back and without missing a beat, Shepard picked up the rhythm with his own rapid fire punches. Garrus stepped behind absorbing the momentum of the bag.

"Ugly is an understatement. The three of us didn't speak for nearly a year after that. My sister and I had always been close...but, that was hard. She simply can't fall in line. 'The regs are there to hold you back' she says..."

"Sounds like my kinda girl," Garrus put in, mandibles unconsciously flaring into a smile.

Shepard's punches stopped and he peered at Garrus suspiciously around the side of the bag. One eyebrow raised.

Garrus fumbled. "Ah.. the regs thing….'cause she's your sister...well _and_ a human. You know what. Just forget I said anything."

"Just keep digging, Vakarian." Shepard said with a laugh as he went back to punching. "Maybe one day you'll get to China."

"Get to what?" He peered at Shepard around the bag, his head tilted in confusion, a strangely bird-like movement. Shepard took advantage of Garrus' distraction to give the bag a hearty kick. The back-swing would have knocked Garrus off his feet, if he were Human. However, the Turian was too fast. He side-stepped and instead the bag glanced off his hip. Garrus recovered himself and glared at the Commander. This prompted another laugh from Shepard and he stepped back, shaking out his wrists.

"Never mind, Garrus. It's a human expression." He twitched his head towards the bag, offering Garrus another go. They switched smoothly each instinctively accommodating the other's movements.

Garrus worked the bag in playful competition with Shepard as they circled again, the heat of the exercise beginning to set into his muscles. They cycled several times until they were both panting heavily.

"So, how'd did things work out? Between your mother and your sister I mean." Garrus asked as they rested.

"Well, they reached a kind of compromise. Maggie left for Earth and ended up working for a military contractor on Luna."

"Uh...huh..." Garrus gave the Commander a knowing glance and Shepard ducked his head with a smile.

"She's good at what she does," Shepard continued evasively as he resumed his exercise. "The project was joint civilian contractors and Engineering Corps. The Corps were impressed by her work and made her an offer."

"And that made everything ok?"

"Not entirely. Some other stuff happened that brought us back together. Even so, it's still kinda tense between them. But Maggie is back in the fold, albeit in non-combat roles. It's not exactly what mom wanted, though. I think she's disappointed that Maggie is no Marine or Navy officer. But Maggie is doing what she loves. So, it's all worked out."

"And I'm sure you had nothing to do with that?"

"Hey - whatever works right? If I can get the two of them to get along, dealing with the Council will be no trouble at all."

The both laughed, then paused to glance over at Wrex on the other side of the cargo hold. The Krogan seemed to notice their gaze and glared at them.

Shepard gave him hearty nod. "Wrex," he called in greeting.

"Shepard," the Krogan replied curtly and went back to cleaning his shotgun.

"See?" Shepard gloated, turning back to Garrus. "I'm making progress already."


	9. Chapter 6: Noveria

Chapter 6: Noveria

The mission had not gone as intended.

It took the combined efforts of Garrus and Shepard to drag Liara through that last onslaught of Rachni and into the elevator before the hot labs became much, much, hotter. The two of them were injured in the process.

"Three days on this dirty corporate rock is three days too long" Shepard growled as he leaned against Garrus. Together, they stumbled out of the Mako onto the solid grating of the Normandy cargo bay. They both hissed in pain; spatters of blue and red blood mixing underneath them. The team was waiting for them uneasily in the cargo bay while Dr. Chakwas waited on standby in the med-bay.

Ashley was quick as a flash to duck under the Commander's arm, gently taking his weight onto her shoulders and together they moved slowly towards the elevator. Tali and Kaidan both moved to Garrus who waved them off, his voice more gravelly than usual.

"Just a scratch - see to Shepard."

Behind them, remaining inside the Mako, Liara hugged her knees to her chest, tears silently streaming down her face.

A few minutes later, Doctor Chakwas had forcefully ejected Ashley from the Med-bay and tinted the windows from prying eyes. Garrus and Shepard sat facing each other on the edges of two of the hospital-style beds. Their heads were bowed like two kids in detention. They suffered Dr. Chakwas' scolding with ill humor. Apparently, Rachni venom is terribly dangerous...assuming you survive the Rachni.

Garrus had taken a slash across his abdomen. It cut through his armor and probably would have disemboweled a human, but his plates soaked most of the damage. The blue blood had stopped flowing and, in time, his plates would knit themselves back together. He'd add another scar to the tally. His armor was collected in a tumble at the foot of the bed and he sat holding a medi-gel compress across his middle. Overall, he seemed none-the-worse for wear.

Shepard, on the other hand, was turning some horrid shade of pale green as Dr. Chakwas carefully cut away the armor around the eight inch-long Rachni claw sticking gruesomely out of his mid-thigh. The rest of his armor had been removed and the blood trickled from the wound, down his leg, puddling on the floor.

"Shepard…" Dr. Chakwas spoke in a soft voice. "I really need you to lie back now."

"Don't knock me out," he commanded with steel in his voice. His breathing was labored, but he hadn't moved.

"We'll need to operate, it's still injecting venom into your bloodstream," the doctor countered, placing a hand on his shoulder to gently push him back. Shepard resisted, his only response was a low growl in the back of his throat. He stubbornly stayed upright.

"Commander…I really must..." Dr. Chakwas began - but didn't finish. Before she had completed her sentence, Shepard's gloved hand had wrapped around the lowest part of the protruding claw and, without a sound, he wrenched it from his flesh, tossing the severed claw with casual disregard clattering onto the Doctor's tray.

Garrus and Dr. Chakwas stared at him in mute astonishment. Shepard raised his eyes, looking at Garrus with a lopsided smile, despite his shuddering breaths.

"Puny...bug," he jested.

Garrus met his smile with a fierce Turian version of his own, mandibles flaring and teeth bared, nodding in silent approval.

Shepard looked back to the Doctor, finally shifting his legs to stretch out on the bed. Slowly, he laid back on the pillow. Chakwas set busily to cutting away the bloody remnants of his under-armor heavy weave.

"No sedatives please, Doctor." He coughed slightly. "Just a local and patch me up."

Doctor Chakwas glowered at him from her work over his leg and she had a masterful glower. "I really must protest. We don't know the long-term effects of the venom and the ext…"

"I have complete faith in your abilities, Doctor Chakwas." He interrupted her and offered her a pained smile. The Doctor seemed to wilt under his charms and resumed her work. There was always something special about working on soldiers; and Shepard was exactly it...as infuriating as he might be.

"Joker?" Shepard called out.

"Yeah, boss?" the pilot's voice crackled from unseen sources in the room.

"Get us off of this rock. Takes us to the Citadel." His voice was level without a trace of the pain he must obviously be experiencing.

"Alright, shore leave!" hooted Joker. "Course plotted, 6 days out Commander"

"Inform the crew - debrief in…" he glanced at Chakwas, she held up four fingers. "Three hours." She narrowed her eyes at him and Shepard shrugged as if it couldn't be helped.

Just then, the med-bay doors opened and Tali entered. The Quarian was half-guiding and half-carrying a dazed and sniffling Liara back to her quarters. Chakwas, Shepard, and Garrus all stared in silence as they watched the pair cross the length of the med-bay and disappear behind the doors on the opposite side.

"Was she bleeding?" Garrus asked, confused.

"Belay that, Joker. Debrief in five hours." Shepard amended.

Chakwas, despite everything, managed to look smug as she went back to work.

* * *

Ashley stormed out the elevator into the cargo bay, fuming. The Commander was injured. It was bad enough that he seemed far more interested in the Asari doctor than her own charms. Even worse, that he was involving untested, rookie aliens in vital combat missions. But, now he was injured, threatening the entire operation because of some stupid blue space bitch who couldn't do anything more than cry. By the time she reached the cargo hold, her body was shaking with rage, jealousy, fear, and irrational fury. The rest of the crew looked up expectantly as she approached, obviously expecting a report. She pushed past all of them angrily. Kaidan gently grabbed her arm.

"The Commander?" he asked softly.

Ashley wrenched her arm away with a curse, but stopped with her back towards the rest of the team.

"Leg wound - he'll be fine after the venom is purged," she reported in a growl.

"Oh, thank the goddess!" came a sigh and all eyes turned to Liara who had emerged from the Mako. She was spattered in gore and looked haggard while leaning heavily against the Mako. Whether from exhaustion or relief, it was hard to say. Her tear streaked cheeks and slumping posture gave her a strange air of vulnerability.

So, it took everyone by complete surprise when Ashley flew at her, screaming.

"You stupid fucking blue bitch!"

Before Tali, Kaidan, or even Wrex knew what was happening, Ashley leveled a full-strength punch at the Asari's jaw which connected with a sickening thud; knocking Liara down to the ground beside the Mako.

"It's your fault! You goddamn xeno!" Ashley raged.

Liara caught herself on her hands and was immediately flattened by Ashley's weight on top of her, a human knee digging painfully into her spine.

Liara's fists wreathed with biotic glow before an unseen force wrenched the Gunnery Chief sideways, sending her skipping on her backside and careening into the opposite wall of the cargo bay with a crunch. Liara used the Mako to pull herself upright, dazed, wiping pale blue blood from the corner of her mouth.

Ashley scrambled to her feet and started to rush the Asari again before Kaidan interjected himself, grabbing Ashley from behind in a bear hug and pinning her arms to her side. His own biotics flaring to hold the struggling woman at bay.

"Stop it, Ashley! This isn't helping." Kaidan shouted at her as he tried to hold her back.

Wrex had thrown his head back laughing. "Ah! She's got spirit - let her go, human. It's good sport."

"I just froze… I didn't mean.. I'm so sorry..." Liara murmured, more tears slipping down her cheeks.

"Oh not yet, you're not!" Ashley hissed, struggling against the Lieutenant's biotic hold. "You nearly got the Commander killed. I will fucking _make _you sorry."

"Tali! Get her out of here!" Kaidan ordered, tightening his grip on Ashley. Tali nodded and quickly ran to Liara's side, guiding her gently and speedily towards the elevator.

"Stand DOWN, Williams." Kaidan bellowed. Ashley's military training trumped her rage and she ceased her struggling. Kaidan winced against his rapidly brewing migraine and released the biotic field around the Gunnery Chief. Ashley, once again free to move, pushed Kaidan away and stomped back to her station.

"Spoil sport." Wrex grumbled.

Kaidan's eyes never left Ashley. "Take a walk, Wrex."

Wrex growled and stood to his full height, stepping forward to confront this measly human.

"You don't order me ar.." Wrex started to snarl.

"Please…" Kaidan interrupted, turning to look at the Krogan. Then repeated softer, rubbing his temples."Please, Wrex. We need a moment."

Wrex tossed his head with a huff. "Yeah… it's chow time anyway." The big Krogan lumbered towards the elevator, glancing over his shoulder at the Human pair. As he rounded the corner, he caught a glimpse of Ashley throwing herself into Kaidan's arms.

"Humans…" he scoffed to himself.

* * *

Back in the Med-bay, Tali carefully, with as much neutrality as possible, retold the events that taken place in the cargo hold. Shepard listened with a stoic mask as Chakwas finished with her bandages on the his leg and excused herself to handle the cleaning up. The Doctor paused only briefly to check on Garrus' "scratch" which required some additional bandaging.

"Don't pick at it," she chided gently to the Turian who raised his talons in mock submission to the doctor.

All four of them stared at the red interface hovering above Liara's door. She had locked herself in.

"We all were linked in and following your progress." continued Tali, her helmeted gaze didn't look away from the door. "It really wasn't her fault, freezing up like that...at least… I think it could have happened to anyone down there."

Garrus and Shepard glanced at one another, both obviously concerned. The silent conversation between them took a brief moment.

"Tali…" Shepard began gently. "I appreciate the team's concern over our safety - but from now on, I'd like it if you didn't follow our missions remotely, unless specifically asked." He glanced again at Garrus who nodded approvingly.

"Shepard… I.." Tali hesitated and her helmet lowered to look at her hands fussing nervously in her lap. "I'm sorry, Shepard. I understand." Shepard reached over and gave her gloved three fingered hands a reassuring squeeze.

Doctor Chakwas carefully slipped her arm around the young Quarian's shoulder and led her out of the Med-bay. Garrus and Shepard sat in contemplative silence.

Shepard heaved a frustrated sigh. "If you have any ingenious insights about how to handle this, Garrus, I'm open to suggestions."

"No way, Shepard. This is a Human thing. Not covered in the C-Sec manual."

Shepard glanced again at the door. "I guess I should go talk to her."

Garrus rolled his eyes and inclined his head in a manner that said "obviously" before carefully sliding off the bed and moving to the Commander's side; helping him take the few hobbling steps to the door.

Garrus left Shepard there and returned to gather his armor, specifically not listening to the muted conversation happening through the locked door behind him. He started to leave when he heard the Commander's exacerbated groan.

"Oh goddamnit…"

Garrus glanced subtly over his shoulder. He saw Shepard looking at his omni-tool - but the door interface now shown a welcoming green.

Shepard punched a button on his wrist and sighed when he answered.

"Hello, Maggie. This is really not a good time."

"No shit this isn't a good time!" her angry voice shot back from his omni-tool. "There's reports all over about a mysterious lab explosion on Noveria involving some kind of Spectre of the Human variety."

"How the hell did reports get out that fast?"

"I have my ways…"

"Don't worry about me, Mags. I'm ok, I promise." He reassured her with amazing patience considering the situation. "Look, I really can't talk right now…" he paused and looked up at Garrus a mischievous gleam in his eye."But, the second-in-command of the ground team can fill you in…"

Garrus shook his head, adamantly. "Oh no, Shepard. Absolutely not! I'm not gonna…." Shepard disregarded him and with a wave of his omni-tool, the image of Staff Sergeant Margaret Shepard appeared on Garrus' wrist.

Garrus glowered at Shepard, who offered him a silent pleading look. Garrus continued to glare.

"You owe me," the Turian muttered. Shepard inclined his head in thanks to Garrus. He entered Liara's quarters, which immediately returned to the locked, red interface again behind him.

Garrus took a deep breath and looked at his omni-tool awkwardly.

"Uhm. Garrus Vakarian here."

There was silence.

"Hello?" Garrus repeated uncertainly.

"Keep talking..." murmured the young woman on his wrist, dreamily.

"Yes Ma'am..." he slipped into his C-Sec "dealing-with-civilians" tone.

"...I'm happy to report your brother is safe and sound. Only a minor leg injury and he received immediate medical attention. He'll make a full recovery and the mission was a success."

"Wow…. you could read me the goddamn phonebook any day," the girl sighed happily.

"Excuse me?"

"Ah! Ahem… ugh… sorry. Has anyone ever told you that you have a very...distracting voice?"

"No."

"Well, you do! Anyway, It's nice to finally talk with you, Officer Vakarian. You really need to message your sister."

"Solana? How's she doing?" Garrus asked, genuinely pleased, all formality dropping from his tone.

"She's got a boyfriend and he's got piss under his plates." Maggie reported flatly in Turian, anger and defensive posturing poorly formed around her sub-vocal communication in the language.

Garrus sighed and scooped up his armor with his other hand as he made his way back to his bunk. This was going to be a long conversation.

* * *

After a tense debrief and an even worse romantic confrontation afterwards, Shepard was on edge. The entire ship echoed her captain and a thick air of tension hovered about the Normandy as she headed towards shore leave on the Citadel. It may have taken a couple of days, but eventually her crew returned to a mostly normal routine. Kaidan had become the unofficial ambassador to Ashley, who rarely left her weapons bench and Shepard took on the same role for Liara who was almost never seen outside of her quarters.

So, when Shepard enlisted Tali's help in repairing the claw-shaped hole in his armor's mid-thigh - he was surprised to find himself, Garrus, Kaidan, Wrex, and Tali sitting in a semicircle around his armor and the armor repair kit on the floor of engineering. This arrangement resulted in the most amusing complaints from Engineer Adams and his team, who eventually joined the armor repair and cleaning challenge.

After Shepard's armor was repaired, the team began to work on Garrus' armor and eventually Kaidan added his to the mix. Wrex curiously watched the proceedings, since Krogan had their own unique armor traditions. The good natured chatter was a welcome relief from the tension brewing in other parts of the ship and Shepard was pleased to find his Alliance crew comfortably working with the other species on-board. The Commander was lost in his thoughts, polishing a gauntlet until it gleamed, when Garrus sitting on his right nudged him.

"Hmm?" he looked up at his friend and gradually his attention focused back to the conversation.

"... it all comes down to position and cover." Kaidan was saying energetically, gesturing with a soiled cleaning cloth, a piece of his blue Alliance armor laying across his lap. "And, I've never seen anyone move through cover like Shepard. Hands down."

"He moves like a Krogan." Wrex confirmed with a nod.

"He would still need good combat drone..." Tali added without looking up from her final patches on Shepard's leg component.

"No combat drone can keep up with him," Kaidan said enthusiastically. "I've watched this guy kick off a wall, roll over cargo and land in perfect firing stance behind cover while keeping a six-inch grouping to his bursts. It's unreal."

Shepard offered an uncomfortable laugh. "Thanks for the vote of confidence, Kaidan. But, I won't be doing any of that until I'm back to full-speed." To emphasize the point, he stretched his leg a few times.

"Did they teach you that at N-School?" Kaidan asked, returning back to his armor.

Shepard shrugged. "How to use cover? Some. A lot of those instincts came from ship running growing up."

Tali looked up, her helmeted voice was horrified. "You sold stolen ships?!"

Shepard laughed and shook his head. "No no.. bad choice of words. Sorry, Tali. But, that's what we called it. There's not much to do for a couple of kids stuck on Alliance ships. We used to 'run the ship' - race from one end to the other through maintenance shafts and cargo holds. Using whatever we could to swing or climb on along the way. Moving quickly through small spaces - it was a game for us."

"Children play games like that in the Flotilla too!" Tali seemed to beam through her helmet.

"So, wait...Tali you're not a kid?" Garrus rumbled playfully. Tali picked up a dirty rag nearby and threw it at Garrus, hitting him squarely in the face. The rag hung limply from his visor and the whole group shared a laugh.

"So, it's like parkour or free-running back on Earth?" Engineer Adams asked, excited to be contributing to the conversation.

"Uh. Sure. I have no idea what that is but yeah - why not." Shepard responded, non-committal. "Maggie… my sister, she would set up holos of pirates for me to shoot at. It turns out it's also good training for close quarters firefights."

"Huh." Kaiden intoned thoughtfully. "So, what do you do when there isn't cover?"

Garrus and Shepard glanced at each other - both thinking back to the cover-less run through Rachni a few days before.

"Fight somewhere else," he intoned somberly. This prompted a round of laughter from the team and Shepard looked down at his armor in his lap.

He hadn't been joking but the warmth caused by their laughter stuck with him all the way back to his cabin.

_A family you will build…_The Consort's words echoed in his mind and Shepard smiled to himself. ..._I've built a damn fine family._

Shepard had just finished limping his way around the mess hall, putting his repaired armor into his locker when Garrus appeared by his side.

"Hey, Commander. How's the leg?"

"Still attached." Shepard responded with a smile. "How's your 'scratch'?"

"What scratch?" Garrus replied with a grin before asking. "Shepard, I hate to ask, but there isn't much privacy in the crew quarters. Could I use your terminal?"

Shepard laughed. "You need to call your girlfriend?"

"Ah, no." Garrus shifted uncomfortably. "Just a call home."

"Yeah. Of course, Garrus." The Turian followed Shepard back to his quarters as the Commander set-up his terminal for the call.

"I never did thank you for running interference with Maggie for me." Shepard continued.

"It was no trouble, Commander."

Shepard laughed. "Ha. Maggie and trouble go together like Tali and her suit. But, really, thank you. I was in no mood to deal with her."

Garrus chuckled quietly to himself. "Yeah. Sure, whatever I can do to help."

Shepard stepped away from the terminal and headed for the door. "Take your time, I'm going to check on Liara for a bit."

Garrus nodded and sat down at the terminal. Shepard paused just outside the door, smiling to himself when he heard:

"Hey Mom…. yeah, it's really me….. no, everything's fine. Just checking in… Is Solana around?"

_Damn…_Shepard thought to himself._ One chat with Maggie worked better than months of prodding. I wonder if I could unleash her on Ashley...or the Council…_


	10. Chapter 7: Cerberus

_**Authors Note:**_

_**Drksyders here! So, for those who haven't read it already - there's a stand-alone short romance/erotica scene from this fanfic. It's called "Biotics Do It Better" and it was posted earlier this week. It takes place between Chapter 6: Noveria and Chapter 7: Cerberus. Be forewarned sexual content lies ahead. As always, your comments, favorites, follows, and messages are appreciated! Hope you all enjoy!**_

* * *

**Chapter 7: Cerberus**

The new rule aboard the Normandy was that no one talked about Feros. Not that there needed to be a rule. No one _wanted_ to talk about what happened on Feros.

The entire ship seemed to mimic the disquiet and unease that the mission had triggered in her Commander. Despite spending most of his time underneath the Mako, Garrus could nearly taste the hushed and anxious tension in the air. Even the unflappable Wrex seemed disturbed by the recent mission, spending more time sleeping than usual. The silver lining to this cloud was that it had thoroughly overshadowed any previous tension and the skirmish between Liara and Ashley was entirely forgotten.

Shepard made it his personal mission to find every Exogeni Thorian related piece of research and destroy it "with extreme prejudice." Information on Feros hinted at a rogue organization called Cerberus which circled back to an earlier favor for Admiral Kahoku regarding a missing squad of Marines. Somehow, it was all connected. Shepard turned to Garrus, calling upon his investigative skills to help put the pieces together.

They spent hours together in Shepard's quarters pouring over stolen data, Alliance files, and extra-net reports for clues. Meanwhile, Shepard led the Normandy around the galaxy, destroying mercs and nuclear probes at every turn. To the Commander's cipher addled-mind, it seemed that there were fewer and fewer lives to save and more and more monsters to destroy.

After discovering the missing Marines were setup in a Thresher Maw trap, Shepard "completely lost his shit" according to Joker. Garrus wasn't entirely sure how bodily functions were related to Shepard's unhinged violence, but the situation was so tense that he didn't bother to ask for clarification.

The Commander's rage radiated throughout the ship, sending most of the crew hastily scurrying away from him like he had scale-itch. Shepard seemed to recognize his own growing darker tendencies. He held the aggression in check, barely. Despite his obvious efforts, Shepard's fury still bubbled beneath his calm exterior. Only Liara seemed to genuinely put him at ease and Garrus could sense the change in his Commander during their chats around the punching bag. Despite his deterioration, Shepard maintained his rounds and his dedication to the crew. That alone would have inspired Garrus' complete confidence in his Commander.

Kaidan and Ashley were the only ones who seemed immune from the dark mood; the two sneaking off alone at nearly every opportunity. Garrus found himself spending more time in the battery and the mess to avoid overhearing...things.

Sometimes, his superior Turian senses were a curse.

The mess was where he found himself, mulling over a bowl of dextro slop, when Kaidan sat down across from him.

"I'm worried about Shepard," the Lieutenant said without precursor.

Garrus studied the Human for a moment then returned to his food.

"Are you now?" he rumbled, feigning disinterest.

"He's losing focus on the mission."

"You think _he's_ losing focus," Garrus scoffed. His avian eyes moved to Ashley who ate at a nearby table with a few other human crew. Kaidan at least had the decency to blush.

"We've crossed half the galaxy chasing Thorian experiments, Cerberus, mercs and God knows what else. We even investigated that distress call from the medical ship." The Marine persisted.

"That turned out to be Geth…" Garrus reminded him patiently.

"Yeah… I know. But, what about Saren? We got that lead on Virmire and instead we're chasing Wrex's armor and Tali's data."

"Ah, but you weren't there to see the look on that Krogan's face," Garrus mused with a wistful Turian smile.

"That's not the point and you know it!"

Garrus sighed. He really didn't want to be having this conversation. He remained silent and ate the slop that passed for his food.

"Common, Garrus," Kaidan tried again, "I know you've seen it. Ever since that Thresher Maw, he's different. And, I get it. After Akuze and all…"

Garrus glanced up and interrupted the Lieutenant. "I heard some of the other crew talking about Akuze. What is that about?"

"Oh. I thought everyone in the Alliance knew…"

"Do I look like Alliance to you, _Human_?"

"...Right. Shepard was the only survivor of a Maw attack on Akuze. Lost his whole squad...50 men sent to investigate," Kaidan began solemnly.

Garrus froze and stared blankly at the man. Kaidan wasn't on the ground crew for that drop, so he didn't know about the Thresher Maw attack being a trap or the pieces of evidence he'd put together with Shepard that Cerberus was behind it. As that huge puzzle piece dropped into place, Garrus suddenly understood the Commander's righteous fury.

Garrus had never once questioned Shepard's actions or leadership, despite the recent bizarre change in the mission's direction. But, now he could comprehend the Commander's reasoning. Vengeance. Revenge. Justice. _That_ Garrus could understand. That was a cause that stirred his blood and sang to the very marrow of his bones.

_That is a fight that joins brothers by spirit, _Garrus thought to himself in wonder. _And, he included me._

He didn't even hear Kaidan tell the rest of the story as his mind churned over this revelation. Garrus forced his focus back into the conversation at hand.

"... you got to talk to him. He listens to you. We can't let Saren get away like th-" The Lieutenant was saying, but Garrus interrupted impatiently.

"I think we just need to step back and let the Commander take care of this."

Kaidan slapped his hands on the table with unnecessary force as he pushed himself up, drawing startled looks from the other crew.

"Fine. Whatever, Garrus. I just don't think he'll still _be_ the Commander at this rate." The Lieutenant stomped off angrily and Garrus turned a blind eye to the fact that Ashley chased after him.

Garrus took his time finishing his meal, ignoring the stares of the crew. He hated to admit it, but maybe the Human biotic had a point. He considered working on the Mako, but the idea of heading into the cargo bay with Ashley and Kaidan gave him pause. Instead, he headed for the crew quarters and sat with a slump at the terminal. He stared at the out-going vid-call screen as he composed his thoughts and finally made the call.

"Alliance Engineering Corps switchboard, how may I direct your call?" The VI chimed.

"Staff Sergeant Shepard - Eden Prime please."

* * *

Kaidan stepped out of the elevator, feeling his cheeks burn with frustration. He could also feel the biotic tension wreathing around his fists. Kaidan usually kept his distance from his team and crew. He'd learned hard lessons about getting personal with your team at Brain Camp. He knew the dangers of losing control.

_Damn, Shepard. Damn him for changing everything… Damn him for making me care._ Kaidan growled to himself.

He knew it really wasn't Shepard he was mad at, but it was easier to curse the Commander than himself.

Kaidan lowered his head to avoid the gazes of the few straggling crew hanging about the cargo bay. They caught sight of him and headed for the elevator. Some even offered him knowing smiles.

Kaidan ignored them and darted behind the stacks of crates that roughly allowed him privacy. Wedged between the Mako and the storage containers, he found himself in a small, shadowed sanctuary. With an aggravated sigh, he leaned heavily against the bulkhead.

The Lieutenant was greeted by a sharp SNAP as the static discharge in his body reacted to the metal he touched. The Marine winced and slowly released the tight control he was holding on his biotic impulses. The space was illuminated by his blue corona and Kaidan focused to shape the warping gravity into something harmless. With a sigh, the tension left his head along with the stored energy and frustration. He rubbed his temples, trying coax away the pain.

Ashley probably could have been more subtle when she followed Kaidan into the cargo bay; but, Ashley didn't exactly consider herself a subtle kind of lady. Besides, she wasn't ashamed and she could beat the tar out of anyone who dared make a fuss. She found Kaidan in their "bedroom" as she had jokingly named it. Kaidan was bathed in a soft blue light that still made her heart flutter at the sight. He looked at her, a fierce and smoldering look in his dark eyes. Ashley knew that look and started to unbuckle her armor.

"He's not going to help." Kaidan growled, pacing the small space.

Ashley watched him, popping her armor seals and pulling off the pieces of her outer layer.

"Told ya. He's a Turian," she gloated.

Kaidan frowned and stared at her, his eyes roaming over the skin-tight weave revealed by her disarming. He gulped.

"You can't rely on the aliens to look after humanity. We gotta look after our own." She continued, punctuating her statements with additional bits of armor that she removed, revealing more and more of her curves. "...I'm starting to wonder if the xenos are getting to him. He's acting unpredictably - dangerous even - and you know it."

Kaidan was cornered, pinned between her words and the effect her undressing was having on him. He had only enough blood to run one major organ at a time - and two were struggling for supremacy.

"Shepard would never be a danger to us…" he tried to counter her words lamely, his eyes following her body with obvious desire.

Ashley unzipped her under-weave and revealed an expanding delta shape of soft sun-kissed skin. At the sight, Kaidan's mind fumbled as he warred with his libido.

Ashley saw his expression as she wiggled the skin-tight under-weave free. She knew she'd won. She _liked _winning. Kaidan was the most adorable, sexy, and well-endowed puppy she could have ever wanted. Yet, as much as she enjoyed her time with the Lieutenant, she still tried to keep her distance.

Ashley studied Kaidan's gentle features, lean body, and dark eyes. Just because he was her consolation prize, didn't stop him from being a damn amazing prize. She crossed the space between them in two quick steps and kissed him fiercely, pinning him back against the nearby crate with gusto.

Kaidan hardly noticed their impact against the crate, though he'd find the bruises later. His lips and hands absorbed his attention. His hands were eagerly exploring Ashley's thighs and lower back, pulling her hips tight against his own. His lips were smothered by hers and Kaidan indulged in the energy buzzing in his mind from her taste. His tongue caressed hers and she pulled away, nipping at his lower lip with a smile while her fingers hungrily loosened the fastenings of his pants.

Kaidan chuckled against her lips, running his hands up her sides, caressing her warm skin with tender strokes. He ignored the slight discomfort of the static charges that sparked between the direct contact of their skin. Biotics tended to build up more electrical impulses in their bodies than typical Humans, resulting in the constant static discharge. It was like living his entire life dragging his feet in wool socks on thick carpet.

"Whoa… Ashley.. no foreplay?" Kaidan sounded almost disappointed, though he was kicking off his boots.

"I don't fuck around…." Ashley panted in a husky voice.

Kaidan's hands followed the curve of her sides along her hips and upwards to her breasts, teasing her nipples with his thumbs before he stroked downward, rolling her body-suit down her hips.

"I think there's some strong evidence to the contrary."

"If you don't stop talking and take me, I just might shoot you."

The sound of her voice made him shiver. Kaidan never thought he'd enjoy being dominated, but with Ashley it just sent him over the edge. With a flick of his wrist and a biotic pull, he ripped her under-weave from her body and Ashley met his assault by shoving him to the ground and shoving his pants down to his thighs in her haste.

Kaidan gasped at her touch and before he had the chance to recover himself she was lowering her hips onto him, rocking slowly downward. Her movements didn't stop until he was buried in her and her weight caused his pants to press painfully into his thighs. With another biotic push, he removed them and Ashley gasped above him from the sensation of his invisible hands against her body. She hooked her toes beneath his bare thighs for better purchase and braced her hands on his shoulders, forcing his back against the cold metal floor and freeing her hips to ride his length.

He closed his eyes, laid back, and let her have her way. Experience told him it was better that way.

She was dripping over him now, shuddering and so close. Kaidan's hands urged her on, pressing into the firm skin of her ass. Kaidan felt her tense, he could feel her trembling in the anticipation of her release and he was determined to make it as mind-blowing as possible for her.

Kaidan rolled her over and pulled up her thighs, driving himself into her with renewed vigor. He at least had the courtesy to roll her over onto her body weave, rather than subject her to the cold floor. He braced himself with one hand beside her head as his other held her thigh, pulling her up and into his every stroke. The pleasure rocketed through her body and Ashley tried to stifle her moans. When she failed, she sank her teeth into Kaidan's forearm to silence herself instead.

Kaidan let out a yelp of pain, pulling his hand away, his upper body pitching forward to press flush against hers. They looked at each other a moment. Ashley's gaze heated hunger and lust. Kaidan's eyes soft and caring. Carefully, he slipped his arms about her, his casual strength holding her close while he resumed rocking into her body. She moved with him slow and deep until she was crying out in pleasure once more.

Kaidan kissed her then, breathing in her moans as his hips pushed her up to and over the height of her pleasure. Her back arched and her mind went white, unaware of the cries Kaidan wrested from her.

She bucked against him, her body convulsing with her orgasm and Kaidan only increased his speed.

He followed her eventually, his hips jerking into her. They trembled together, twitches and sparks jumping between them as Kaidan's biotics triggered with his shuddering nerves. Kaidan lifted his head and looked into her eyes, his expression tender and protective. He gently touched her hair, combing it with his fingers until it framed her face. Ashley found herself being pulled into that affectionate gaze and looked away, wriggling out from under him. She grabbed her under-weave roughly, forcing Kaidan to roll back onto the cold metal floor.

"Ashley… " he panted softly as he tried to reach out for her. "You're beautiful… You don't have to put on those clothes quite so quick."

She paused and looked at him, her eyes softened and a blush crept up her cheeks. The shy smile made her eyes shine. This would be the moment for tenderness, or at the very least, honesty. She could tell he was hoping for it by the optimistic look in his puppy-dog eyes. Instead, she pushed him away coldly and dressed.

"I'm sorry LT, I just don't want you to get court martialed for fraternization."

Kaidan sighed and reluctantly reached for his pants. Ashley kept her back to him and winced at the hurt she heard in his voice.

"I understand, Chief."

* * *

The conversation with Maggie had only ignited Garrus' anger. Since they were on an unsecured channel, neither of them gave details. Yet, Shepard's sister dropped careful, subtle hints as if speaking in code. It was enough to completely dissuade any reservations about the justice of the Commander's purpose.

"If he's as pissed off as you say he is, he's got damn good reasons. He knows the lines better than anyone and he doesn't cross them…...not unless he really has to," she had reassured him.

Her face had a strange expression Garrus couldn't read when she said the last few words and her voice seemed haunted. It only lasted a heartbeat before her fierce and friendly nature was back in place, masking whatever emotions and honesty the Turian had glimpsed.

Garrus hesitated, watching the girl's image on the vid screen suspiciously. "I just don't know what to do to help." Garrus finally admitted to her.

"Just watch his back and stick by him. I know he can be a dick when he's focused like this, but he's never wrong."

"There's got to be something more I can do."

"You're a good guy and a good soldier, Garrus," Maggie said with a smile. "You'll know what to do when you need to do it."

Her advice wasn't helpful. Yet, Garrus felt oddly reassured.

The next day they found Admiral Kahoku's body in a Cerberus facility crawling with Thorians, husks, and Rachni. Shepard loomed over Garrus as he examined the body and Garrus could barely keep his own voice from swimming in anger as he reported the needle tracks he'd found. After seeing the look on his friend's face as he took the news, Garrus wanted nothing more than to be a brother to Commander John Shepard's devastating vengeance.

Normally, the Commander was cautious, overly prepared, and precise with his tactical planning. However, the discovery of Cerberus' main operations base brought out some kind of renegade savagery in the man. Garrus could only watch as Shepard ordered Joker to make it to the base by the day's end. The snarky pilot didn't even sass the Commander about the extra strain the reckless flight would put on the ship.

Twelve hours later, Garrus hadn't once left Shepard's side and neither of them had slept. They prepared their weapons and armor together in a dark and brooding silence. Wrex was the only crew member on board who seemed indifferent about the headlong assault on a rogue terrorist group's base. So, he was the only one invited to come along.

By the time the squad returned to the Normandy, the underground base was a cave-in and the only things left were the handful of files in Shepard's hard suit and a very disappointed agent of the Shadow Broker.

Shepard was just about to leave the CIC when Joker chimed in again.

"Commander - I thought you'd want to know, a shuttle escaped the Cerberus base before it was destroyed."

"Follow it," the Commander ordered coolly.

"It was just a small personnel shuttle..." began Joker uneasily.

"I said, follow it. None of those bastards get out of there alive."

"I can't, sir!" Joker sounded horribly defeated. "It hit the relay - no telling where it went."

"You can't track it?" Shepard seethed, his hands twisted on the railing above the Galaxy map and the metal creaked in his grip.

"It'll take time..."

"Do it." Shepard commanded, turning towards the elevator and stripping off his armor. "Run a system scan while we're here too."

"Aye aye, Commander" Joker echoed, sharing an uncertain glance with Garrus as they watched him go.

* * *

For over a week, the Normandy chased after trace energy signatures of the rogue Cerberus shuttle. It brought them through multiple systems and left a trail of dead scientists. Garrus and Shepard poured over the reports, trying to find a connection between the scientists. Best they could tell, the corpses were all current or former Cerberus and Alliance operatives or employees. They were working late into the night, running on stims and coffee, when Tali appeared in the mess.

"Shepard. Garrus. What are you doing up?"

"I could ask the same of you." Shepard mumbled, stirring his coffee.

Shepard sat across from Garrus, who was pouring over a data-pad. Tali reached over him and poured herself a cup of the levo coffee Garrus was nursing.

"It's too quiet on the Normandy to sleep. Not enough noise, too few people."

Shepard and Garrus glanced at each other briefly.

"I suppose the Normandy is very different from the ships of the Migrant Fleet."

Garrus snorted. "You're just asking for a lecture on the drive core with comments like that, Shepard."

"You do have an _amazing_ drive core." Tali swooned, much to Garrus' amusement.

Shepard studied Tali a moment and seemed to come to a decision. "Well, since you're up anyway, Tali...maybe you could help us out."

"Of course, Shepard. Anything I can do to help."

Garrus slid the datapad to Tali who sat herself next to Shepard.

"Cerberus shuttles… I thought we were going after Saren?" Tali asked after studying the datapad a moment.

"We are - Just...gotta take care of his first."

"Hmmm…You know the Fleet has no fondness for Cerberus. So, I'm not sad to see any less of them. But, there has to be a pattern to these killings. I could develop an algorithm to mine the data, try and find out where your rogue shuttle is going next."

Shepard blinked in surprise. "You can do that?"

"Absolutely. We have a similar program tracking Geth movements. I can use a modified version with your energy signatures here. The Admiralty would be unhappy if I use Quarian technology on an Alliance vessel though."

"But, we're using it to go after Cerberus. Does your Admiralty really need to know?"

"I can keep a secret if you can." Tali said playfully, nudging Shepard's arm.

"What do you think, Garrus?" Shepard prompted and the pair glanced across the table at the Turian who was snoring softly, his fringed head pillowed on an outstretched arm.

Together, Tali and Shepard snickered quietly as they took the datapad to work elsewhere. A few minutes later, Shepard returned with a blanket and draped it over the sleeping Turian before heading back to work.

* * *

"Chief, you finish the mods on my girl?"

Ashley nearly jumped out of her skin at the sound of the Commander's voice. She had been listening to messages from her sisters back at home. She fumbled at the controls but not before her sister's voice teasingly called the Commander "cuuuuuuuute."

"Tell me you didn't hear that."

"Your sister, I assume?"

"Until I get home and kill her. That's Sarah, the youngest. I'm surprised to see you here, sir. I thought you'd be chattin' up - what's her name - T'soni?"

Shepard already regretted this conversation. He'd just swung by to get his rifle and now he was getting grief over Liara and a complete run-down on Ashley's family history. Shepard had to silently count to ten to calm himself down when she referred to his relationship with Liara as "making nice with the bug-eyed monsters."

_You cannot punch your crew, _Shepard reminded himself firmly_. Especially, not the girls._

The more he learned about Ashley though, the more he understood why she had been so attracted to him. They were eerily similar. They both came from military families, both had bratty younger sisters, both soldiers living up to a family legacy, both sole survivors from disasters that killed their squads. For Ashley, he suspected, it was the similarities between them that made him attractive. For Shepard, on the other hand, they had the exact opposite effect.

His frustration with the Gunnery Chief softened when he listened to the story about a boy getting fresh with her sister. That hit a little too close to home. Then, she started reciting poetry at him and he was simply baffled.

The rumor-mill reported that she was getting awfully cozy with Alenko. And, as long as it didn't get in the way of the mission, Shepard approved of the liaison. It took the sting out of his guilt for rejecting her. Now that she wasn't flirting with him, he found himself warming up to the Chief. Maybe, it was time to pull her back into ground team rotation...after he'd ripped those 'maw-loving Cerberus shit-heads limb from limb.

"So, look about my rifle…."

"Oh. Right. The mods went in great. Vakarian picked it up about an hour ago."

"I see. I should go."

As Shepard approached the Mako, he could hear Garrus' stifled laughter echoing from beneath it. He kicked the Turian's feet that protruded and a heartbeat later Garrus slid out from under the armored tank with a melodramatic sigh.

"aaaahh… poetry," the Turian mock swooned.

"Damn your Turian ears. I _will _shoot you, you know."

"No, you won't. I have your rifle."

"Fine. Give me my rifle so I can shoot you."

"Not a very convincing argument there, Shepard."

"What were you doing with my girl anyway?"

"Giving her a little love from the spirits…" Garrus grinned as he stood himself up and moved to his workbench. A moment later he returned. Shepard's rifle gleamed with fresh mods, fresh cleaning and a small plate built into the stock. Garrus held out his talon.

"Give me your _Kahw-rieal_."

Shepard's ill humor prevented him from smiling, but he dug under his shirt to pull the chain of his dog tags over his head and dropped them into the Turian claw. A moment later, his sister's christmas gift, the kwah-whatever, was set into the base, glimmering prettily.

Shepard stepped next to Garrus and the two admired the assault rifle together.

"It's a pun, you know," Garrus rumbled quietly.

"A pun?"

"Honor them with life - In our language, the words for honor and life are very similar."

Shepard ignored the comment and scooped up his rifle.

"Tali's intel shows we might beat our rogue shuttle to the punch this time. We hit the Newton system in less than an hour. I want you and Alenko locked and loaded."

Garrus frowned, remembering his earlier conversation with the Lieutenant. "Are you sure about Alenko, Commander?"

"We'll need his biotics and I don't want Liara to see this."

"Yes, sir…. are you really ok to do this?"

Shepard cocked his rifle and sighted down the barrel at the floor. "Six years I've been waiting for this… Abso-fucking-lutely."

* * *

As soon the Normandy hit the Newton system, Shepard knew they were in the right place; as Garrus had said "he could feel it in his gut." Admiral Hackett's intel just confirmed what they already knew. Tali's data proved to be spot-on. The Commander was jittery with anticipation by the time they stepped into the base on Ontarum. He was actually disappointed that there were only a dozen mercs to kill.

Garrus tried to keep things light with his usual banter, but Shepard ignored him entirely. This was blood for blood, by the gallons. Shepard had forty-nine lives to avenge and only one scientist left to do it on. He was convinced that the rogue shuttle was a Cerberus operative terminating loose ends. If he could just get there first, he could find the truth and exact his vengeance.

Nothing in the galaxy could have prepared Shepard for finding his old Corporal - Robert Toombs stealing his fury right out from under him.

"Stay back! I've got no grief with you. All I want is this bastard."

Shepard shot a glare at the trembling scientist held at gunpoint. _You and me both, buddy. _Shepard thought darkly.

"Mr. Toombs - you're insane you need help!" pleaded the scientist.

"SHUT UP!" Toombs shot back. "You don't get to lie… You don't….Shepard? My god, Shepard is that you?"

Shepard recognized the man immediately and stood in frozen silence as he tried to sort out how Toombs had survived, or if he had finally cracked and was hallucinating. Slowly, Shepard reassured himself of his sanity and came to terms with the truth. He'd been chasing his former comrade on a vengeance quest around the galaxy.

"Corporal Toombs? B-But I..I saw you die on Akuze. How did you get here?"

Tooms' story of torture at the hands of Cerberus only confirmed all of Shepard's suspicions in horrifying detail. Shepard's rage vanished, replaced by debilitating guilt.

"Toombs, I- I didn't see anybody." Shepard was shaking. "If I'd have seen you, I'd have come back for you. I swear."

"...This man deserves to die, Shepard. For you, for me, for everyone else in the unit. Are you with me?"

Hell yes, he was. Forty-nine lives. Children without fathers, wives without husbands. Six years of pain and guilt. Shepard lifted his assault rifle to his shoulder, sighting down the barrel at the trembling scientist's ugly face. His finger curled around the trigger.

_It's a pun you know...Honor them with life. _

Shepard couldn't understand why he remembered Garrus saying that, right at this moment. Yet, he could remember his sister's voice, like she was standing right next to him.

_You will honor them, John Shepard._

He let out a shuddering breath and lowered his rifle, glancing down at the small metal plate in the stock. The whole room seemed to hold its breath and watch as Shepard studied his rifle in quiet contemplation for a moment before returning it to the holster on his back.

"You're better than this, Toombs"

_I'm better than this._ He was really saying to himself.

"You're not like them."

_I'm not like them._

"I was tortured for _years_, Shepard! You can't judge me. You don't have the right."

"Toombs, if I could have helped you on Akuze, I would have. All I can do is help now. Let me."

And, Shepard reached out his hand.


	11. Chapter 8: Virmire

**Chapter 8: Virmire**

"Suit up, Garrus!"

Shepard's voice echoed through the Cargo bay with equal parts jest and command. Garrus looked up from the Mako, tilting his head curiously as the Commander emerged from Engineering with Tali at his heels.

"Suit up?" The Turian asked skeptically.

"That was a joke. You're always armored," Shepard quipped.

Tali laughed appreciatively and Garrus frowned, looking down at his armor.

"Are you referring to my plates or my actual armor?"

"Well, damn. Now, you've gone and spoiled the joke."

"I thought we were still three days out from Virmire." Garrus asked curiously, reaching for his weapons from the nearby workbench and latching them onto the hardpoints of his armor.

"Four days now, actually. I've made a short detour. We'll be hitting the Herschel system in 5 minutes."

Garrus' mandibles flared into a wide predatory grin, his avian eyes sparkling with malice. The Turian growled a few octaves lower than usual.

"Dr. Saleon?" He made the name sound like a curse.

Shepard nodded.

At this point in the conversation, Shepard stood in the center of the cargo bay. Wrex was polishing his grandfather's armor on his cot nearby while Ashley and Kaidan talked quietly together at the weapons bench. A few other engineering and support staff were milling about with the requisitions officer. While no one was actively looking at him, Shepard could feel their focus circling him like a pack of nervous varen.

"Joker, you listening?"

"Uhh.. is that a trick question, Commander?

"Alright, listen up team. I owe you all an apology. I know for the past month I've lost sight of our mission, hunting for the terrorist group known as Cerberus. These missions were sanctioned by the Alliance, but I must admit I had a personal stake in them as well. I make no apologies for what we accomplished, only for my behavior. At times, my anger got the better of me and for that there is no excuse. I can promise you all that going forward it's not anger that drives us - but Justice. Justice for the civilians of Eden Prime. Justice for scientists at Noveria. And, Justice for the colonists at Feros. We're chasing that bastard Saren until he hangs for what he's done….Semper Fi Marines!"

"Oorah!" chorused the Alliance crew. Ashley and Kaidan were loudest of all. The Humans were obviously rallied, eagerly patting one another on the backs. Even Wrex seemed bolstered by the energy, punching his fists together and raising his shotgun in salute.

Tali and Garrus looked at one another in mutual confusion and Tali offered a faint shrug.

Shepard reveled in the energy of his crew, shaking hands and chatting for a moment before Joker announced:

"Arriving in Herschel system now, Commander. Picking up something on long-range scans. The MSV Fedele."

"Garrus, Tali. With me," Shepard ordered as he headed for the elevator. The boisterous cheers followed them through the CIC.

"Shepard," Garrus began as they finally moved out of earshot of the crew. "Far be it for me to question your inspirational speeches….but I don't think Dr. Saleon is relevant to catching Saren."

"He's relevant to you, Garrus. That's good enough for me."

* * *

Maggie Shepard's voice crackled with irritation from the terminal in Shepard's quarters. "Tell me you did not just ask me to interpret the behavior of a Turian I've never met who's on _your_ ship four million light years away?"

"Uhhh…. What if I did? You know Turians. I thought you could offer some insight." Shepard tried to justify himself, but his excuses sounded pretty lame. His sister had a magical way of making him feel like a total dolt.

Maggie's image on the vid-screen rolled her eyes.

"I lived on Palaven for two years - that doesn't mean I'm instant Turian expert. Besides, Turians are just like people. They're assholes and heroes and everything in between. I've never met the guy, how the hell should I know if he's mad at you?"

"Well, I know you've spoken to him a couple of times…"

"Yeah, when you're avoiding me," Maggie interrupted and glowered. Even from millions of lightyears away, Shepard could still feel the accusation in her gaze. He shifted uncomfortably.

"I _said_ I was sorry about that!"

"You totally didn't mean it." Maggie teased him, but she was smiling. It was just their way. "I'll take it as a personal favor if you don't take anymore wounds to avoid me over."

"Noted."

"Good. Now, I've got better things to worry about than how you pissed off your Turian sniper."

Shepard frowned.

"Throw me a bone here, Mags. I stopped him from killing that Salarian and he's pissed. I might have overstepped some boundary that I don't understand. Are you sure it isn't a Turian thing?"

"Did he hit you?"

"Well, no. He's just avoiding me."

"Then, he's not _that _pissed."

"Thanks, Captain Obvious."

"You're welcome, Lieutenant Commander Socially Inept."

Shepard snorted derisively in response. There was simply no dealing with the girl sometimes.

On the other side of the galaxy, the dark-haired, slender Engineer glanced down at her brother's image on her wrist and sighed. She uneasily glanced about the docking bay and inched away from her team, lowering her voice and blocking the image on her wrist with her body as she spoke into it.

"Look, he's a soldier alright? But, he's also your friend. Just treat him like you would any other friend. Do whatever you guys do to work out your problems. Drink beer, throw punches, piss off a roof. But, don't treat him differently 'cause he's a Turian. If you still can't figure it out, talk to someone on your ship, like that blue hussy. Asari are supposed to be good at this shit right? I can't do anything for you from..." Maggie hesitated and glanced behind her uneasily, "uhh...where I am."

Shepard looked thoughtful in the blurry holo hovering above Maggie's wrist.

"Ok - I think I have an idea about what to do. Thanks, Mags."

Maggie couldn't help but smile at her sibling. Even from this distance, she felt the pride and warmth of his thanks.

"No problem. How's everything else going? You handle that Cerberus bullshit?"

"Yeah - I'm not sure I'm ready to talk about it yet - but it's handled."

"I read ya. Let me know when you're ready to …" Maggie trailed off and looked away from the screen.

One of her new squadmates was waving to get her attention.

"Twelve minutes 'til contact, my lady," he gushed.

Maggie rolled her eyes.

"I'll be right there, Johnnie." She turned back to her wrist. "Look, Jo-Jo I really gotta run."

"Who is that guy? You got a hot date?" Shepard teased.

"He wishes...I'm sorry, duty calls. But, we'll catch up again soon ok?"

"Yeah, of course. Behave yourself, you hear?"

Maggie winked at the image on her omni-tool. "You know me! Fly safe out there."

She dropped her wrist and turned to her team.

"Alright, let's move out."

Back on the Normandy, Shepard starred in quiet disbelief at his blank terminal screen. It was only the briefest glimpse, but as his sister's wrist had dropped, he saw her surroundings and her clothing. She appeared to be in a weapons depot or some kind of staging area and it had almost looked like his sister was wearing red light-weight armor and had a pistol on her hip. He hadn't recorded the call and he had no way to play back the feed to find out for sure.

Shepard shook his head. It had to just be his overtired brain filling in combat-like images where there were none. It didn't stop him from worrying though.

Communications engineers don't use pistols, at least as far as he knew.

* * *

Liara watched the Commander pace the small space of her "office." The Asari Doctor leaned against the edge of her desk, arms crossed, and patiently observed the Commander's awkward uncertainty. Their relationship was something new and strange to her. She had never had another member of any species take such an interest. They had confided in one another; their time together was like a separate peace from the rest of the missions and crew. Learning and growing together, her quarters were sanctuary. He asked questions, listened, and his gentle compliments made her feel strong. Shepard made her feel like she was the most powerful being in the galaxy.

The Asari worried that she had confessed her feelings for the Commander too soon. But, he chose her over Ashley and seemed to reciprocate. But, whatever they had was obviously set aside while he pursued the fury-driven assault on Cerberus. Now, that hurdle had passed only to be immediately replaced by another; much more endearing one. She sighed inwardly; just as she was getting up the courage to act on her feelings, too.

"He's avoiding me, Liara. I just know it. After I stopped him from killing that Salarian… What if he's lost respect for me?"

"Does his respect matter so much to you, Shepard? You seem more upset about the Garrus' behavior than other more… problematic displays from your crew."

Liara hadn't particularly said any individual; but Ashley was certainly in her implications. The wayward Marine had caused nothing but trouble and the Commander had for the most part ignored it. He pulled her off the ground team rotations in punishment for her striking Liara. But, a substantial part of the crew agreed with her more xenophobic tendencies and any further actions might have caused schisms in the Normandy's personnel. Shepard blew out a breath as he considered the Asari.

Liara made him think about things differently. It was part of the reason he was drawn to her so much. He made a herculean effort to keep his eyes from roaming down her lean curves. That was certainly part of the attraction, too.

"You're right. Of all the crap facing us right now, it's silly that Garrus should be my chief concern. But, it's really bothering me."

"Of course his behavior bothers you." Liara said with a smile, stepping forward and touching his forearm softly. "He's more than your crew. He's your friend."

Shepard let his gaze run from the Asari's hand to her eyes. He felt himself smile and gently covered her hand with his own as he leaned in towards her.

"Yeah. I guess he is."

Liara could feel herself blushing, the touch of his hand and the look in his eyes and his smile.

_By the goddess...when he smiles._

She pulled away suddenly, afraid he could read her feelings like another Asari might. She was rubbing her hands together nervously as she moved back towards her terminal.

"So, how would you handle his behavior...as a friend?"

Shepard frowned when she pulled away. He watched her a moment and figured perhaps he had overstepped some kind of Asari boundary without knowing.

"I'll have to give that some thought. But, thanks Liara. I think you pointed me in the right direction."

"I'm happy to be of any assistance, Shepard. I… uhmm.. is there anything else?"

She risked a glance at him out of her eye, hoping maybe there was.

"No. Thank You, Liara. I should go."

"Goodbye, Shepard." She sighed as she watched the doors close behind him.

* * *

Garrus didn't want to see Shepard. His anger was still too fresh. The Commander's explanation about predicting people's reactions and controlling your responses was thought-provoking, but it failed to quench the thirst for blood. However, Shepard said "guys night" was mandatory attendance the night before they reached Virmire.

So, as instructed, Garrus had grumpily tromped his way up to the Commander's quarters to find Kaidan, Wrex, and Joker gathered with Shepard around his terminal; already cracking into bottles of beer.

"Garrus!" everyone cheered him upon arrival and all he could do was frown.

"What's going on?" Garrus asked suspiciously.

"Dirty Harry. Grab a seat - it just started. Dextro booze on the left." Shepard said simply, sliding over to make room for the Turian.

Garrus stood at the doorway awkwardly for a moment and then submitted himself to the inevitable.

"_you've got to ask yourself one question: "Do I feel lucky?" Well, do ya, punk?_"

Garrus was riveted. "What's that?" he whispered to Shepard

"His badge. It's like your C-Sec ID."

"And, he just threw it away?!"

"Shhhh!"

By the end of the vid, Garrus found himself relaxed; his anger vanquished like so many "punks." They stayed in Shepard's quarters long after the vid had finished, laughing and discussing the finer points of Inspector Callahan's badassery. Shepard shared his modified Razer for all to see and it was universally agreed that the mods really did make the weapon look like the legendary .44 magnum, which made Kaidan beam with pride.

Later, Kaidan enthusiastically argued for a modern remake of the vid with a biotic Inspector Callahan and eventually enlisted Garrus' support for the idea; on the condition he was a C-Sec Inspector with a Turian partner. Wrex calmly informed them that they were all wrong since the only true way the character could be recreated accurately in modern times was as a Krogan on Tuchanka. Shepard, carefully, refused to take sides, and Joker's snarky humor kept them laughing late into the night. As the evening wound down, the others left one-by-one and Garrus lingered.

"I'm glad you liked the vid, Garrus." Shepard offered as they cleaned up the empty bottles around his terminal.

"I did...and thank you for inviting me."

"Of course, wouldn't be a 'guys night' without you."

"I thought it was interesting…Callahan always gave them a chance to surrender. In the end, it was the criminal's choice."

Shepard smiled. "I thought you'd like that."

"I did. It… made a lot of things clear."

"Good. Ready for tomorrow, then?"

"I'm here when you need me."

* * *

_I really should have known better._ Shepard thought bitterly.

He was sitting on the beach at the edge of the Salarian STG camp on Virmire, watching the waves serenely wash ashore. He'd just managed to talk Wrex down from imminent violence; and he wasn't even sure it was the right thing to do. It was just the most expedient course of action for the mission.

_Hah...the mission._

Shepard tried to think about how many "Investigate and Report" missions in his career had ever really involved simply investigating and reporting. Was there ever a single one that didn't result in bloodshed and death? He ran down the mental list of his dozens of completed "I&R" missions over eleven years of military service from Akuze to this shit-storm on Virmire and he couldn't tally a single one that went smoothly.

_When all this is over, I am never taking another I&R again._ He knew he was lying to himself. But, it was reassuring somehow. He heard Liara's footsteps behind him, but kept his eyes on the ocean in front of him.

"Captain Kirrahe has asked for you. He's prepared a plan of attack." She said softly, staring at his back.

Guilt was eating at her. She'd told him to she wasn't ready, asked him to wait to handle their personal feelings towards each other until after the mission. She'd never really been in combat before, she was quickly learning the calculating coldness of dealing in violence, but suddenly with death staring them in the face, waiting seemed like a bad idea. All she wanted was to indulge in the feelings that has built up between them.

Shepard stood mechanically taking a last glimpse of the ocean before turning. Liara caught his hand with hers.

"Shepard, about us… I really wish th.."

"Liara, I'd like you to stay on the Normandy for this one." he interrupted.

"Oh. I… I see."

"We can talk when I get back." he gave her hand a squeeze before letting go.

"Y-Yes, Shepard."

Liara cursed herself for a coward and paused to watch the Commander walk away. With a sigh, she headed back to the Normandy.

Shepard listened to the Salarian Captain with his cool and confident Commander act covering his bitter thoughts. As kamikaze plans go, Kirrahe's wasn't a bad one. He sent Ashley with the Salarians, since despite being a royal pain in the ass, she was a good soldier. He genuinely thought she'd have the best shot at dragging the STG team out alive. And, Kaidan's tech skills would be more valuable setting up their jury-rigged atomic bomb. They were as ready as they were going to be, and yet, Kaidan was doing an awful lot of reassuring aimed at Ashley. The Gunnery Chief was looking straight at Shepard.

"Don't worry. We'll see you on the other side." The Lieutenant was saying.

"I know, I ah, it's been an honor serving with you, Commander." Shepard felt like she was apologizing as she said it. That was the most disturbing thing yet. So, he gave her assurances too.

"...we're still a team. Watch each other's backs, keep your eyes open, and fight like I know you can. We'll all come out of this in one piece."

"You bet, Commander."

Before Shepard could gather his team, the Salarian Captain launched into a speech that would've done the British Bulldog proud.

"Keep Calm and Hold the Line" Shepard muttered quietly; mimicking Churchill. He caught Ashley hiding her chuckle behind a cough.

Shepard was making his last preparations with Garrus and Wrex. Grenades. Medi-gel. Armor seals. Weapons. Everything was in order. Wrex was getting impatient and restless; the rage barely restrained in his uneasy pacing. Shepard took the Krogan by the shoulder and looked him steadily in the eyes; a feat he was only able to accomplish because of his height.

"We'll get him, Wrex. We'll make him pay for your people and my people both."

The Krogan snorted out a breath with a nod. They started to move off together when Shepard noticed Kaidan hovering.

"I'll meet you at the wall. Garrus, let the Captain know we're ready to move on his signal."

"Affirmative."

Shepard took a few steps away from prying ears and Kaidan immediately followed him.

"What is it, Kaidan?"

"Look, Commander...off the record… about Ashley…"

"Now is really not the time..." Shepard growled.

"You should have sent me!" the anger in the Lieutenant's voice was tangible.

"She can handle herself, Lieutenant. I'm not going to argue about this with you. Get your head out of your pants and focus on your job."

To Shepard's surprise, Kaidan didn't back down.

"Look, if you want to court martial me when this is over, that's fine. I got no illusions about this ending in happily ever after. Just as long as she gets out of this ok….Please, Shepard. She's important to me."

Something in the tone of the young man's voice gave Shepard pause. Involuntarily his thoughts went to Liara back on the ship. It was unfair and he knew it.

_A family you build…They will give you strength_

"_Everyone_ is getting off this bloody rock - except for Saren. You read me, Lieutenant? Thanksgiving is this week and I sure as hell ain't cooking."

"Yes, sir." Kaidan blushed sheepishly.

Shepard smiled and held up his hand.

Kaidan seized Shepard's hand with a fierce grip and Shepard pulled the smaller Marine into a hug. Their armor scraped and rattled together at the gesture before they pulled away. Kaidan looked up at the Commander and matched Shepard's smile with one his own.

"What makes the grass grow, Marine?"

They said it together.

"Blood, Blood, BLOOD!"

* * *

"I understand, Commander. I don't regret a thing."

There was nothing more to be said. Sometimes, the simplest things meant the most. The Lieutenant scrambled for cover against the onslaught of Geth that funneled out of the drop ship. It was convenient since it created an easy bottle-neck where his biotics could do the most damage.

Perhaps it was just the adrenaline, imminent death can jumpstart your brain afterall, but everything moved slower. The details around Kaidan were so much more poignant. He could feel the coolness of the water around his ankles, the rippling tingles of the mass effect fields that shred through his body, the faint smell of ozone that buzzed from his shields. In his comm unit, he could hear Shepard still trying to negotiate with Saren and pride filled his chest so much it ached.

Kaidan let loose another burst of fire at the tumble of Geth, but they were starting to push through. He heard one of his men gasp as he took a bullet, but together they held their ground. Those synthetic bastards were never going to get close enough to the bomb to disarm it.

Kaidan ducked behind the bomb to let his assault rifle cool; popping out to throw another biotic blast into the onslaught. His omni-tool displayed the countdown - four more minutes.

It was strange how even knowing he was about to die, that these were the last minutes of his life, part of his mind still wondered about the mission. Shepard's firefight with Saren was echoing over his comms, he could hear Garrus, Wrex, Ashley and even Captain Kirrahe coordinating their attacks against the single opponent.

"I hope the punk feels lucky…" Kaidan chuckled to himself, but no one nearby was alive to appreciate the joke.

He heard the Normandy swing past low to pick up the rest of the team...and Ashley. He followed it with his eyes, silently willing the ship to get her to safety faster. The diversion cost him a bullet punching through his shields and armor and into his gut. He instinctually blasted the offending Geth with his biotics, sending the synthetics scrambling before he doubled over against the nuclear bomb.

"We can't leave without Kaidan!" he could hear Ashley arguing over the comms; it sounded like she was struggling. "We have to go back for him!"

"Williams, there's no time. Get on the ship!" he could hear the Captain Kirrahe's odd voice arguing with her.

"No...NO! Not without him!" Ashley was growling. "Kaidan, can you hear me? We're coming to get that shapely ass of yours right now!"

Kaidan hauled himself upright and leaned back against the bomb, panting heavily. With a grunt of effort, he pulled out his pistol and kept firing.

"Ash…" he mumbled hoarsely, unsure if his comms could even pick up his voice. "Please… Ash… Just go…."

Terror was running through him. Ashley was stubborn and willful at the best of times. He could only imagine the fight she was putting up on his behalf.

_Could the girl be so hard-headed to get herself killed for me? Maybe she really feels something for me..._

In his mind's eye, he could see her throwing punches to get free from the Salarian Captain and running down the corridors towards him. It was hard to breathe, he looked down and noticed the water pooling around him was turning red, but it was cool, comforting, and it didn't hurt anymore.

_Will my blood make the grass grow?_

"Kaidan…" the Commander's somber, but reassuring voice came over his coms. "We've got her. She's safe."

Kaidan felt his body relax and he looked up at the darkened sky to watch the Normandy fly to safety. With the cloud cover, the sky looked a lot like an ocean he remembered from Earth. He'd loved watching the ocean from his parent's deck in Vancouver. It was a beautiful view.

As he watched, the colors began to shift - colors beyond words, swimming like the curling edges of comets. He could see a vast sea of shifting planets, systems, and galaxies spinning together through the currents of those colors.

"Th-thank you, Shepard." He gasped and let his heavy eyes close. It felt like he was floating.

"See you on the other side, Kaidan."

* * *

Shepard watched through the Normandy's windows as the flash of the nuclear bomb illuminated Virmire. He felt the empty numbness that had nearly paralysed him so many years before. He embraced it, wrapped it around himself like a blanket, and let it creep over the thoughts that he didn't want to hear right now.

"Debrief in an hour"

"I'll let the team know, Commander." Joker confirmed in a hushed tone.

Garrus took charge of settling in the Salarian team. Wrex went immediately to sleep and Tali led Ashley to the med-bay where Dr. Chakwas took charge of her care. The Doctor immediately sedated her, even though she only suffered minor cuts and bruises. At the back of the med-bay, Liara waited anxiously for Shepard to come speak with her. But, he never came.

After the debrief and council report, Shepard kept himself busy in mindless routine. He showered, he ate, he cleaned and polished his armor, disassembled and oiled his weapons, cleaned his quarters, read his reports, and even checked on the Salarians they'd managed to save. He did everything he could to keep himself moving. That worked until he had no other option but to face the last task he was trying to avoid.

Shepard settled himself in his cabin with the strongest bottle of alcohol he could find. He'd polished off about a quarter of it when Garrus appeared at his door, holding two bottles and two glasses. When he entered and saw Shepard sitting at his terminal with his own bottle, Garrus let out a dark remorseful chuckle.

"Great minds think alike."

Shepard didn't look at the Turian, he was staring at an outgoing message screen on his terminal. The message was addressed to the Alliance Command, the subject was "Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko - KIA." The cursor blinked following "It is with the deepest regret..."

"Why are you here, Garrus?"

Shepard hadn't meant for the question to be as harsh as it ended up sounding.

"They say if you drink alone…you have a problem."

Shepard looked up at the Turian, noting the bottles in his hands, then nodded to an empty seat.

Garrus sat down and set out the glasses, pouring a glass for each of them out of their respective bottles. They sat together, drinking in sullen silence for a long while. Eventually, Shepard's voice broke the silence in a soft, even tone.

"How does the Turian military inform next of kin?"

Garrus swallowed the rest of his glass in one long pull, mandibles pulled tight in a grimace against his jaw. The Turian inhaled sharply at the sting of the drink, his voice was rough and low.

"There's a specific messaging system. Bypasses all other protocols immediately to the family. Plays a recorded message from the Primarch, thanking them for their sacrifice."

Shepard nodded and looked down at the glass in his hands.

"How will Alenko's family be notified?" Garrus asked in a hushed tone.

"There's a specific branch of soldiers - Casualty Assistance Command Officers. A pair of them will arrive at their home or workplace in full dress uniform. They will ask for an opportunity to speak privately with his family and then inform them of his death. They are specifically trained for it, stress response, psychological therapies and all. After, they stay with the family until someone is called to comfort them in their time of need. An officer will be on call to assist until after the funeral."

"Oh." Garrus said lamely. "That's much more…" he failed to find the right word.

"Compassionate?" offered Shepard, with a dark and humorless chuckle.

"Human," Garrus said, with a frown. "It seems. . . vulgar, somehow, to have strangers intrude on a private time of grief." He tossed his drink back in one gulp and slammed the glass down onto the table.

"So you just leave the grieving widow alone with a fucking recording? That's it?" Shepard grimaced and leaned over to refill Garrus' glass. "That's cold."

"False comfort is worse," Garrus retorted. "If your 'Casualty Assistance Officers' were there when the fallen soldier died and could bear witness to the sacrifice - then they would be worthy. Better to hear it later from someone who was there. . . to know the truth. To be told, not only of how your loved one died, but how his comrades avenged his loss and commended his spirit to the regiment."

"So, Human soldiers comfort widows..." Shepard said, bitterly. "...And, Turian soldiers avenge the fallen."

Garrus raised his glass in silent salute. "Between you, the Human, and me, the Turian, we'll do both. For Lieutenant Alenko."

"Amen to that," Shepard said grimly. He finished his drink in one quick swallow and turned back to his screen. Garrus sat with him, pouring their drinks in silent companionship, as the Commander finalized his reports and a single message.

_Admiral Hackett - _

_It is with the deepest regret I write to inform you and Alliance Command of the death of Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko, Tactics Specialist of the 5th Fleet; 27th Division Alliance Marine Corps. who was killed in action on Virmire in the Hoc System of the Sentry Omega Cluster on November 23rd, 2183._

_Details of his death and heroic action are specified in the attached reports and will be confirmed by Captain Kirrahe and Commander Rentola of the Salarian Special Tasks Group 3rd Infiltration Regiment. As described, Lieutenant Alenko served with honor, distinction, and courage. His actions demonstrated __conspicuous gallantry and intrepidity at the cost of his own life. He performed courageously above and beyond the call of duty in combat action against an overwhelming armed force._

_For these reasons, I formally nominate Lieutenant Alenko for the Alliance Medal of Honor, posthumously._

_Sincerely yours,_

_Commander John Shepard  
__N-7 Alliance Command, SSV Normandy  
__Citadel Council Special Tactics and Reconnaissance_

After Shepard finished, turned off his terminal and sat back in his chair staring stoically forward.

"You wanna hit the bag for a bit?" Garrus offered

"Yeah, we can pretend it's Saren."


End file.
